Do You Wanna Kiss Me? [Harry Styles Fanfiction]

32 Tessa

Harry goes to the club and i stay alone. I'm left in his apartment alone for the second time. The last time got me into the situation i'm now in. I just hope no one will come but for Harry. I turn the tv on and watch some comedy but i cant concentrate. All i wanna do is crying. I try to stop myself but everything is useless. I just wanna kill myself. I bite my lips. I need to do something and quickly. I get on my feet and walk into Harry's room. I open his closet and pull some sweatpants and hoodie. I look into the mirror in the hall. Well, i dont look attractive but i dont mind. I call uber and in ten minutes leave Harry a note on the kitchen table and go down. I dont have keys so i leave his apt opened, hopping that no one will rob it.

The whole way in uber, i cry.

I called my boss and told that i cant continue my trip here. Luckily, my boss is pretty kind. I go to the hotel, grab my things and catch a cab to the bus station. I dont wanna stay in this city any longer. It brought me only pain - both physical and mental. Why dont i go by plane? I just need sometime by myself. I need to overthink everything and the best way to do that is to go home, back to Rosewell. I guess i can spend the rest of my summer vocations there.

When i arrive no one meets me. I take a cab to my house and call my mom to open the front door. Her voice is surprised and sleepy but she is glad to see me. She helps me to my old room and lie on my back staring at the ceiling. Nothing has changed here. It is surprising me as my mom used to clean my room when i wasnt living here. And by cleaning i mean putting everything in the order. Her order, not mine. I love my chaos. It is easy to find everything. I find some of my old summer dresses. One if them is blue with flower print. I dont feel like sleeping. I look at my watch. It is 6 a.m. i can go to bed earlier today. I text Jess if she is in our home town too. We could spend some time together.

I come to the bookshelf and look through my old books. I can read some love novel. I grab the book and go downstairs thorough the back door and into the backyard. I am caught of guard for a split of a second when i see my brother there. He is lying on a sun bed. He is wearing black sun-glasses. I hope he is sleeping. I take the sun bed not far from the door. I open the book and start tot read but i cant focus as my eyes dart to Kevin every other minute. Is he sleeping? I dont think that he is watching me. It would be creepy.

I have lots of questions in my head. The first one is why my brother is still here. Mom once told that he moved to NYC to work as a lawyer. So why is he here? Mom said that he came on winter holidays but wouldnt come in summer. It is a surprise for me to see him here. I cover my face with the book again and in a minute i hear some movement around me. I look over my book and see Kevin walking towards me. He moves the nearest sun bed even closer to me and sits on it.

'You're here,' i hear his raspy from sleep voice that i havent heard for almost a year.

'Yeah,' i mumble.

'Why are you here?'

'Just need some time to spend in peace and quiet.'

I pretend like i am interested in my book and he makes me bored. Honestly, i am waiting for something more than simple questions from my brother.

'And what are you doing here?' i ask.

'Same.' His hand moves to his pocket and he pulls out a package of cigs from there. I watch him litght one of them.

'Saw your boyfriend a couple of days ago.'

My heart drops from his words. The first one who comes to my mind is Harry. Has he come after me? But next words destroy my dreams.

'Austin was his name, right? Saw him in the mall. He wasnt alone. With some blondie.'

Who is she? Austin doesnt have a sister. Could it be a friend?
So he found someone. He forgot me so fast. Suddenly i dont feel like sitting in the sun. I dont wanna be outside. I close the book and stand up. When i reach the door, Kevin calls for me.