Red vs Blue Season 11: Male Oc

Rvb S11 E12 "Finders Keepers"

Blue Base
Inside of Blue Base, Simmons is watching a gravity lift. Tucker and Wade come walking inside the base and approach Simmons.

Wade: (Groans) This sucks.

Tucker rolls his eyes.

Tucker: Tell me about it. We don't know the first thing about fixing intergalactic radios.

Wade: If it could shoot bullets, I could probably do something with it.

Simmons doesn't listen to what they're saying and continues watching the grav lift.

Simmons: Uh huh.

Tucker: Every movie that I've ever seen with a repairman on it always glosses over the actual repairing part. It's just, "Hey baby, I'm here to lay some pipe" and then bam, two scoops of raisin!

Simmons: Uh huh.

Tucker: Dammit woman! If you let the man do his job, then maybe we would not be in this mess.

Simmons looks back at Wade and points at the grav lift.

Simmons: Hey Wade, what the fuck is this thing?

Wade: Oh, that's just the gravity lift. You step on it and it'll take you upstairs.

Simmons: I know that, but what the fuck is it doing here?

Tucker: It's glowing and goes-

Tucker starts trying to make glowing sounds.

Simmons: So let me get this straight. We're the survivors of a shipwreck, living off of the bare necessities, and in the middle of the room is this incredible feat of modern-day technology.

Wade just rubs the back of his neck, while looking between Simmons and the grav lift.

Wade: Uh, I don't know. Zeta found it on the ship and Wash decided to install it in the base. What's so weird about that anyway?

Simmons: It's like finding a car made of rocks, plastic and a bluetooth radio.

Tucker: Oh, we've got that too.

Siri's iPhone jingle is heard.

Tucker: Siri, play song dance theme.

Siri: Did you mean bomb, Andy?

Tucker: Oh piece of shit.

Siri: Calling bomb, Andy.

Simmons: How are you able to power all of this?

Wade: We've got a power line plugged into the ship.

Simmons: You mean you have a direct line to a limitless power supply?

Wade: Well, not exactly, we'll definitely run out of fuel eventually, just not anytime soon.

Tucker: Who cares about that anyway, take as much as you want.

Simmons: God bless the American way.

Wade: What are you planning on doing?

Simmons runs up to the grav lift and heads upstairs.

Simmons: Just a side project!

Wash: Hey Caboose!

Wade and Tucker turn around to see outside the base, Wash and Zeta running over to Caboose and Freckles.