Homosexuality is Sin.

Faggot

Frank's POV

I got up and got dressed a little more quickly today, rimming my eyes with red eyeliner and messing up my hair just the way I liked it. I sighed and looked down at myself. I looked normal, in my own kind of way. Black shirt, black jeans, black and white converse. I walked back into my bedroom and ripped my shirt off, throwing it into a corner of the room. I went through my closet, searching for something. As soon as the silky black material met my fingers, I smiled and carefully pulled the black dress shirt off the hanger, buttoning it over my chest quickly. I placed my red tie around my neck and smiled. Much better. A little more color.

I walked to school, my hands wrapped tightly around my warm travel mug of coffee and my converse scuffing against the pavement. I realized I needed new shoes and sighed. I probably wouldn't get them for another month.

I trudged through the school gates and was met with an unfamiliar shout of "FRANK!"

I looked up and saw Mikey running towards me, looking excited.

"Oh my God, you look amazing!" he gushed, then calmed down a little. "Gerard brought his lyric book today, come on over!"

Mikey grabbed my wrist and dragged me over to a small group of kids. I saw Ray, Bob, and Gerard standing there already, a large notebook open in Gerard's hands.

The bell rang and I panicked slightly. I was already flustered by Mikey and now I was just confused. Gerard's gaze on me was making me nervous, too, as his usual glare was back.

I crept into the art room nervously. I didn't want to see Gerard yet. It was fine with other people around, but I didn't know what to do. He hugged me, he'd touched me, and he'd been nice to me, and I had no idea what that meant.

I sat down a couple seats from him and heard a muttered 'faggot.'

My heart sank and I dropped my head onto the table, tears running down my cheeks. I'd been on edge already and now Gerard was back to hating me. Of course he was.

When the bell finally rang, I knew my eyeliner had run all over my cheeks and my eyes were red from crying, but I didn't care. Gerard hated me, so what was the point?

I slammed my locker door angrily, trying not to look at the words; 'You're going to hell, faggot,' that were scrawled across it in Sharpie. It wasn't even worth trying to get it off anymore; at least it made it easy to tell which one was mine.

"Hey Frank," said a kind, jaunty voice from behind me. I spun around in surprise and came face-to-face with Mikey. He grinned at me and rubbed my shoulder.

"Sorry about the locker."

"It's fine," I mumbled.

"Come have lunch with us, Ray and Bob want to see you and I think we should talk about Gee's lyrics," Mikey went on, grabbing my hand and towing me towards a table in the corner of the lunchroom. I followed awkwardly, not wanting to see Gerard in case he made me cry again, or reminded me of my tears in art.

Ray and Bob smiled at me as I sat down, my hands shaking slightly. Mikey sat in between me and Gerard. I glanced at the redhead, but he looked away, shoving the lyric notebook into the middle of the table.

I bit my lip, sucking at my lip ring lightly as Mikey began to talk. I could hear the conversation, but the horrible realization that I really had fallen too far for Gerard was eating away at me, and I had no idea what was being said. Every time someone addressed me, I'd just nod or murmur a yes.

"Frank? What's wrong?" Mikey hissed, shoving my shoulder. I looked away and he jumped up, grabbing my hand and pulling me away from the table. I stumbled after him and he tugged me into the boy's restroom.

Mikey stopped and pulled me around to face him.

"Frank, spit it out, I know you like Gee," he ordered. I looked at him and broke down crying. Mikey grabbed me and hugged me tightly, murmuring at me to calm down.

"Gerard s-still hates me!" I choked out, sobbing into my friend's shoulder.

"Shh, no he doesn't, he's just confused and upset. He's worried."

"He called me a f-faggot again!"

"Yeah. He's a dick when he's confused."

Mikey kept hugging me until the bell rang, rubbing my back and trying to calm me down.

I was still crying when I went back to the table to fetch my backpack. Gerard looked at me, then looked away quickly. I grabbed my bag and swung it up onto my shoulder, running off down the halls.

"Frank! Wait!" Mikey yelled, but I ignored him. I knew that the only thing that could calm me down lay halfway across the school. I needed my guitar.

I opened the band room door and Mr. Fuentes looked at me.

"Go get your guitar, Frank, you can have any studio you want," he smiled in response to my unspoken question. I forced a tiny smile and ran into the back, ignoring the kids staring at me.

As soon as I plugged my guitar in, my hands stopped shaking. As soon as I struck the first note, I stopped sobbing. By the time I'd finished my first song, I had forgotten everything.

As it turned out, I had the amp up too loud to hear the bell, so the next thing I knew, Mikey was poking his head around the door, grinning at me.

"Frank?" he called. I stopped playing and looked up. Shit.

"Hey," I managed, putting the guitar down as Mikey slipped all the way into the room, shutting the door behind him.

"I heard some of that from outside, it was really good," he smiled. I looked away with a blush and he walked closer to me.

"You okay? You must not have heard the bell ring. Gerard sent me to fetch you," he went on. I shrugged.

"I'm better, I feel better when I play," I mumbled.

"Good. I think Gerard's picked a song he wants us to come up with instrument tracks for."

"Okay."

I unplugged the guitar and packed everything up, following Mikey out of the room and into a different studio. Bob was sitting behind the drums, Ray was fiddling with a guitar, and Gerard was setting up a mic. Mikey's bass was leant up against the wall, gleaming smugly. Without saying a word, I quickly went to a new amp and plugged my guitar in.

"Okay," Gerard said, looking up and around at everyone, not including me. "So I think Ray, you're my lead and Frank's gonna be the rhythm."

"Gerard but Frank's bett-" Mikey tried. Gerard glared at him and he shut his mouth with a slight snap.

"So we're gonna go with I'm Not Okay. Here's the lyrics."

Gerard ran through the song quickly, singing beautifully. I realized I was staring at him and almost slapped myself.

"I need this line for back-up," Gerard said and read out a line quickly. "And I'll need back-up vocals through the chorus."

"Okay," I mumbled. Gerard ripped a sheet of paper from his notebook and passed it to Mikey, who then handed it to me. It was the lyrics, but he'd highlighted my back-up parts.

Authors note:

MORE POVS

So long and goodnight

~T xoxo