Homosexuality is Sin.

chapter 15

I woke up and groaned. Fucking Saturday. I usually hate Saturdays because they always drag on. I checked my phone and saw three messages from Ray asking if he wanted to hang out. I sent him a quick text and got up, slipping into a pair of clean jeans and a new t-shirt. I thought for a second, then grabbed Gee's hoodie and tugged it on. I walked downstairs and out of the front door, locking it behind me. My hands shook slightly as I stuffed them in the hoodie pocket. I didn't like walking.

I made it to Ray's without any problems, however, and he opened the door happily.

"Hey Frank. How are you?"

I flashed him a genuine smile and shrugged.

"Pretty good," I answered. Ray brightened up even more and grinned.

"That's good! Come on in."

After I said goodbye to Ray, I walked to the convenience store and slipped inside. Kellin looked up and smiled at me.

"Frank, how are you?" he asked.

"Pretty good," I smiled.

"Need anything or looking for someone?"

"Both," I shrugged. I slouched around the store for a few minutes, grabbing a soda and a pack of gum. I paid for them and Kellin grabbed my arm.

"Come with me, I'll take you to the back. If Gerard comes in, I'll send him in to see you. Want a smoke?"

I blinked and nodded. I hardly ever smoked, but I did enjoy it. Kellin showed me the back room and Vic grinned at me from a chair in the corner. He had a laptop on his lap and he waved at me.

"Looking for Gerard?" he asked.

"Sort of," I answered.

"Yeah, he hasn't been by today. He stops pretty much every day, to be honest."

"Really?"

"Yeah. God knows why. Kellin gives him a pack of cigarettes every now and then, but yeah. He hardly ever buys anything."

"He's an odd kid," I smiled.

"He is. That's why he fits you."

I laughed and Vic threw me a pack of cigs.

"Smoke?"

"Sure, thanks Mr. Fuentes."

He chuckled and flipped me off, going back to whatever he was doing on the computer.

I unwrapped the packet and pulled out a cig. I thought for a second and tugged off Gerard's hoodie, throwing it over the back of a chair. I didn't want it to stop smelling of Gerard, and I knew the tobacco would overpower the comforting scent.

I held the cig between my fingers and lit it carefully, taking my first drag and smiling. Mum bought me cigarettes every now and then, but it was very rare.

I looked around the little room and smiled. There was a small, messy desk in one corner, the chair of which Vic had commandeered and was sitting on, working on his laptop. There was a couch shoved against one wall and a couple chairs stood by a small table on my right. One of these chairs was now adorned with Gerard's hoodie.

The door creaked and a pair of arms wrapped around my waist. I grinned and Gerard kissed my cheek softly, then reached around me and took my cigarette, breathing in the smoke and blowing it out in front of me.

"Hey," he whispered, his voice low and sexy.

Vic smiled and shut his laptop.

"You boys probably need some time, I'll be back in ten minutes," he said quietly, slipping past us.

"Thanks Vic!" Gerard called as he left. Gee let go of me and spun me around, pressing his lips to mine. He broke away from the kiss briefly to inhale from the cancer stick, then blew the smoke in my mouth as he kissed me again. I coughed and laughed, shoving him away.

"Dickhead," I giggled.

"You know you love it," Gerard grinned, grabbing my waist and pulling me close to him again. I took my cigarette back and finished it, then stubbed it out on a nearby ashtray. I looked at Gerard critically for a second or so. I grabbed him and crashed my lips to his, knotting my fingers in his hair as I made out with him. He spun me around and pinned me against the wall, his tongue in my mouth.

We broke away for air and I cuddled into Gee's chest, my arms around him. He lifted me up, placing his hands under my thighs. I wrapped my legs around his waist with a tiny squeak and he rubbed my back.

"Now you're the same height as me," Gerard smirked.

"You bastard," I giggled and punched his arm.

"You love me really!"

"I do," I sighed, laying my head on his shoulder. He dropped me to my feet just as Vic walked in, smiling. I grabbed the pack of cigarettes and leaned backwards into my boyfriend as I lit up, grinning up at him. He smiled at me and I took a long drag, staring into his hazel eyes. I finally blew the smoke out and he gently took the cancer stick from me, making me smile as his cheeks hollowed. Damn, he was a sexy smoker.

"Boys, you should probably be splitting up," Vic said from the corner. "You don't need anyone getting suspicious. Gerard, don't come back tomorrow."

"Yes, sir," Gerard smiled sarcastically, but his eyes were sad and we both knew Vic was right. I leaned in and kissed him goodbye, watching him leave with the cig still dangling from my fingers. Vic sighed and I started glaring at the floor, as if this whole thing was the floor's fault.

"Frank, take two packs home, you look stressed," Vic murmured, gesturing to the boxes of cigarettes stacked in the back of the room for storage. "And if you need a new lighter, just take one."

"Thanks Vic."

"No problem kid. I'm so sorry about everything."

"I know. Me too."

I sat up in bed, my chest heaving and sweat running down my back. My hands were shaky. I'd had the same nightmare again, only this time Oli and Patrick and all my other friends were in the yelling mob. Even Mikey and Mum were there, screaming insults as Gerard leaned over me, the knife flashing dangerously.

I leaned over and flicked the bedside light on, swinging my legs up and over the side of the bed. I ran into the bathroom and stripped quickly, turning the shower on and leaving it cold.

After a few minutes, all my sweat was gone and I felt a little calmer, so I dried off and stepped into my boxers, walking over to my bedroom window. I opened it and leaned out, breathing in the beautiful fresh air. I padded back to the bedside table and grabbed a cigarette and my lighter. I lit up, leaning out of the window and staring out into the distance. My fingers were still trembling a little.

"Frankie? Are you okay?"

Mum was knocking at the bedroom door.

"Yeah," I called.

"Can I come in?"

"I'm not all that decent, but sure," I shouted. The door opened and Mum slipped in.

"Oh Frankie, you'll get cancer," she sighed.

"So will you," I shot back. "Besides, I needed it."

"And a cold shower, hmm?"

"I had a nightmare," I answered defensively. Mum relaxed and looked at me sympathetically.

"Tell me about it, baby," she murmured, sitting on the bed. I stared out of the window for a minute, then sighed and began explaining the dream and the deal I had with Kellin and Vic and Gerard.

"This is going to end badly, I just know it," she sighed, dropping her head into her hands. I looked out into the cold October night and didn't move to wipe away the tears running down my cheeks.

"Everything was so perfect," I said, my voice broken and tiny. "We had the band and I had Gerard. We were all okay."

"I know, Frankie, I know," Mum stood up, walking over to me and pulling me into a hug. I rested my chin on her shoulder and closed my eyes, trying to stop the tears that just kept on coming.