Elements: Secrets Of Mages (Book 7)

...But The Mind Takes Time (Chapter 33)

"I'm...engaged."

"What?" Amy blinks, staring at the male standing in front of her. "What's that mean?"

"Oh...um, it means I'm about to get married to someone. Become mates with them? Yeah, that...it's not like I want to, but my parents arranged it and the wedding is soon. Super soon. Anyway, I'm sorry that I didn't tell you sooner," Jamil backs out into the hallway. "And because I'm me...I can't even save myself. I'm sorry Amy, I'm a jerk, I know."

"Why haven't you broken it off then? Your parents died two years ago," Amy frowns. "Do you like the person you're engaged to?"

"I could never...I don't like the person I'm engaged to," Jamil continues to look down at his feet. "But I can't end it. Otherwise...otherwise I'm just being selfish...I'm sorry, but I...I'm not worthy of being your crush."

"What are you going on about? Stop keeping things to yourself, damnit! How is anyone supposed to help you when you keep quiet?!" Amy keeps walking closer. Only making him back away further. "Why can't you tell me...? You said you trust me! So trust me and tell me what's going on!"

"What's the point...?" Jamil says in a shaky voice. His voice cracks as though he's crying. "I've lost! I can't win against her! The wedding is at the end of this month, I can't...I can't fight her...I'm not you Amy! Please, don't try to find out what's going on, I'm just being selfish telling you this anyway."

"Listen here, you're not being selfish telling me about a bad relationship. Whether it's toxic or abusive, or even both, that's not selfish okay?!" Amy keeps walking towards him as he moves backward down the hallway. "Sometimes you can't save yourself because you need help, and it's okay to ask for it!"

"There's no point Amy, I'm just being selfish," Jamil keeps repeating. "I'm being selfish. I'm nothing but a monster if I try anything. You said you didn't tell me because you wanted to protect Owen right? Well that's what I'm trying to do here too. This is to protect Owen!"

"Whatever she's got planned for him, he can handle it! Owen's stronger than you think! He can take on someone trying to kill him! He can stop her from doing anything to him! So just tell me...please!" Amy continues to walk as she throws her arms around.

"It's not as simple as that. I wish it was, because if it was, maybe then I'd consider doing something but no matter what, it won't work," Jamil wipes his eyes. "After all, she'll always be seen as the victim and I'll always be seen as the bad guy. There's no point..!" Jamil's back smacks against a door.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Amy raises an eyebrow, standing in front of him. "You're not a bad guy. And how is she the victim? You're not making any sense."

"I didn't think you'd get it...but that's okay. It's fine since there's nothing to do about it anymore," Jamil starts to walk away but Amy puts her hand on the wall to block him from moving. He goes the other direction and Amy does the same thing.

Jamil then ducks but Amy puts her foot against the wall. She gives him a look that says try-to-get-past-me. He then tries the other direction but her foot comes again.

"There's always something to do. Don't tell me the same mage who told me to not give up on loving myself is giving up on himself?" Amy watches as Jamil gets back up. "Are you really the same mage?"

"I'm not giving up on myself. I tried and was...unsuccessful at it. And, um, I'd really appreciate it if you could stop pining me against the wall," Jamil looks down at his feet, his cheeks pink.

"Not until you start being yourself again. The Jamil I know isn't this. Just tell me what's going on. I promise it's okay to tell me," Amy doesn't move. "You said you trust me, then why aren't you telling me what's going on with you? I don't care if you don't like me back or not, I just want to know what's going on because I care about you regardless."