My Lady, My Love.

True colors (Part 10)

I run upstairs after my parents disapear into the room. I lock myself in there tossing myself onto bed in tears. What's wrong with me? Why does it have to be one man? And it hits me... why any man?

All my life I always rejected any man who has shown interest in me. Is it only cause it's not meant to be? Or is it more than that... just then a newspaper falls from my window cill. I read the cover, "lgbt community rising"

 I turn the page and read more. "more and more citizens in america seem to have an odd type, what is it you ask? same sex relationships. it all starts off realizing you don't have interest in the opposite gender" that sentence... no interest in the oppasite gender, could it be? The thoughts and signs..... As a child all my female classmates would be head over heels for a boy. And my male classmates feeling the same for a girl..

 I break down again, i'm scared of myself..is it right? Is it wrong? If it is wrong what will happen to me? Will i be disowned? I keep on reading "A man in love with another man is identified as gay, and so a woman in love with another woman identifies as a lesbian" That word.... lesbian, is that who i am? If it could be... why am i afraid? Now that i think of it... i rush out of bed and grab a book off my old shelf, i shuffle through the pages of my romance novel.... Heart racing, blood puming, heat increasing.

"Am i in love..?"

It seems all i've ever felt this whole time when i was around Sarah has been... love.

I feel scared, but it changes to happy. I feel a smile form, and tears. It isn't sadness or fear this time. I feel happy, This thing called love. It feels... wonderful, i open my window and stare at the start enjoying this whole new feeling... to admire somebody, it's scary at first but it just brings such joy.

I drift off to sleep with only her on my mind. I guess i really do love her, i can't wait till I see her face again..