TUA Diary Fanfic

Entry 7

Hey BITCHHHHHHHH!

I'M FUCKING THRIVING!

Before I spill the juicy details,

IF ANY OF MY SIBLINGS READ MY FUCKING DIARY

(Except Ben, Vanya, or Alison)

I WILL FUCKING SUCK THE BLOOD OUT OF EACH AND EVERY FUCKING ONE OF YOU AND USE IT FOR VOODOO

That means,

LUTHER, THE LITTLE BITCH WILL LOSE HIS VIRGIN PARTS.

DIEGO, SHALL HAVE HIS NIPPLES CUT OFF WITH A WEEDCUTTER

(Weed haha focus on the point)

KLAUS, I SHALL STRANGLE YOU WITH MY FUCKING BOA UNTIL YOUR BODY IS SO SWOLLEN YOUR NIPPLE RING PULLS ITSELF OFF

FIVE, YOU HANDSOME SOUL, YOU FUCKING DREAMY WITTY BASTARD, YOU HOT OLD MAN AT HEART. I WILL FUCKING GOUGE OUT THOSE BEAUTIFUL EYES OF YOURS AND MAKE YOU SWALLOW THEM

Back to my amazing fucking day.

Surprisingly, Klaus was the first one to wake up. Actually, he is the morning person. He woke me up right away since we stay in the same room half the time.

He told me what Dad was planning.

It's forth of July tomorrow and it's the only way dad will let me fuck with fire works for training.

My power of shock creates Sparks. Sparks create FUCKING BOOMS.

I would only be able to have them if I could ignite them.

NO SHIT SHERLOCK.

He did send us on a run for them. He gave us enough money for thousands and thousands of dollars worth.

It is going to be a bad ass fourth of July.

He'd do anything if it helps get to the bottom of how many damn powers I have. Klaus was all fucking like,

"GET YOUR SORRY ASS OUT OF BED AND PREPARE TO BE A BADASS!" Klaus yelled, banging two pans together.

"Klaus, I shall pull off your fucking nipple ring in your sleep." I realized what he said. I threw a pillow at his face.

"OW! WHAT THE HEL-" I interrupted.

"WAIT WHAT?!" I threw another pillow at him.

"STOP FUCKING THROWING PILLOWS! Dad is letting us have fire works!" Klaus screeches.

We all went to the fireworks shop while Dad worked in his office untill we came back.

We had a hay day. I was trying so hard not to accidentally spark anything.

Luther was all like,

"yOu sHoUlD hAvE fUcKiNg sTaYeD. I aM aLsO, a LiTtLe bItCh"

All he said was I should have stayed. That's not what I fucking heard.

Shouldn't the one igniting them get to choose some bad ass ones in person? Not only that we were able to leave the house.

He was afraid we would be the cause of the deaths of many people.

That only being us and one creepy fucking fireworks salesman.

We had about eight carts full.

Luther had this giant ass list. He wanted to be as safe as possible.

I was fucking like,

"Let loose. Give it a fucking break. Get the stick out of your ass. Screw safe. We can contain it either way asshat."

Vanya, and Ben were getting some smaller ones that they thought looked cool.

Me and Klaus we're trying to fucking get every big dangerous one we could.

We also found some bad ass looking lighters.

Klaus had me distract the cashier so he could steal some lighters for us.

"Just act like you actually give a shit and are interested in his pizza sauce stained shirt." He laughed. I hit him bunch of times.

"Fine, only if you get the entire stock. It's a small box full. GET THEM ALL BITCH I MEAN IT." He put up his hands in defense.

"On thing, fix yourself." He teased my hair a bit. He took some random ass fucking scissors out of his pockets, and cut the middle of the shirt.

"KLAUS!" He pulled it apart a bit.

"THERE NOW YOU LOOK DECENT" I punched his shoulder.

"Get those fucking lighters." I say.

I walked over to the dude. He clearly GAVE NO SHITS for personal hygiene. He literally was our age. 

"Hey, what can I do for ya? You need me to find the flowers? I think I just found one." He smiled. He had food stuck in his FUCKING TEETH.

THAT FUCKING BREATH.

DAMNIT KLAUS YOU OWE ME

I was all like,

"So, You like fireworks huh? Me too. Something about blowing things just excites me." He choked.

Klaus got the lighters.

Five noticed this conversation, and came to pull me away.

"Oh hell no." Five said pulling me by my arm.

"I was having a conversation, Five. Thank you for that though. I was just trying to distract him." I said smiling. He rolled his eyes.

"Right, Now I know how much you love to blow things." I smirked. The cashier looked at me and Five.

"Well, I'll get him to keep his eyes off of you." He kissed me deeply. He made sure he was doing enough to make the dude uncomfortable.

He didn't seem to budge much so Five smacked my ass.

My jaw drops and he turns smirk at me.

The dude looked away. He was eating his pizza.

Klaus came jumping up and down, and was all like,

"You slut! Oh my God amazing job! I take full credit. I taught you well." He pretended to cry and hugged me tightly.

"Every time I see you guys, you make both tits drop." We all laughed.

Five still looked jealous.

"Let loose buddy. Relieve some pressure. Y/n here is good when it comes to blowing off steam." He laughed.

I punched him in the middle of the chest winding him.

I ran to this big ass firework.

"LUTHER! THIS IS THE ONE!" It was called 'Satan's Asscrack'

He gulped.

"We'll take it."

I'm happy to at least know, this fourth of July is gonna be fucking amazing.

When we got home dad had them professionally arranged. We didn't have any training.

Me and Klaus just got high in my room.

We had lighters for days.

Speaking of tomorrow is gonna be amazing. I'M GONNA GET SO FUCKING BAKED.

UNTILL TOMORROW,

Eight

Hey guys, make sure to follow, umbrellaacad and eve_and_isa me and my sister are making a huge ass amazing project based on TUA

So if you guys love TUA as much as we fucking do stay tuned for our book coming out soon!