remedy | vsoo

06 | h a v e n

Taehyung and Jisoo were once again in the small library he had introduced her to. It became a regular thing for them to spend their free time there: looking for new novels, discussing the old ones, and Jisoo recommended him some of her own favorites.

Whether it be together or apart, depending on their schedules, they could let themselves sink into their little world of books. It was their hard-covered haven from the outside world of judgement and expectation.

The two were sitting on one of the couches, silently reading until Jisoo abandoned her book for her phone. Her habit of surfing the comment sections had become more frequent as she got anxious for their upcoming comeback, and Taehyung had taken notice of this during their reading ventures.

"I told you to stop reading those,"

"We're in a library and you're telling me not to read?"

"Don't read those kinds of comments. People like that never have anything nice to say,"

Jisoo hesitantly looked away from Taehyung's piercing gaze as she stopped skimming through several nasty comments about her.

"I can't help it," she mumbled, her grip tightening on her phone before setting it down next to her. The sudden change in the air made Jisoo shift warily in her seat.

"Do you want to talk about it? I understand if you're still not comfortable with me—"

"No, it's not you... I-I just find it hard to talk about my feelings sometimes," she kept her eyes on her clasped hands in her lap, "I don't like having to burden others with my worries,"

I don't want to be weak.

"Sharing your worries isn't a weakness,"

Jisoo turned her head towards him, wondering if he had just read her mind. He was facing her, his eyes full of sincerity.

"And bottling them up isn't good. We're all human. We all feel, but the last thing I want is for you to feel like you're alone. Your feelings matter to me, Jisoo. Don't be afraid to share them,"

Something about his words made her body relax, the guard she had put up gradually evaporating. His eyes mirrored hers, holding remnants of sorrow, and Jisoo realized that Taehyung has probably been very familiar with this feeling— the feeling of not being enough in society's eyes, especially with the notoriety that BTS were acquiring as artists: more love from new fans across the globe and more hate from those who await and desire for their downfall.

Jisoo let her breath out slowly as Taehyung placed a hand over hers, giving it a reassuring squeeze before she spoke.

"What do you do...? When you try your best, but nothing works out the way you want it to. No matter how many times I smile and laugh it off, no matter how many hours I spend practicing, they continue to tell me "you can't sing" and "you can't dance" and "all you have is a pretty face"and... There's a part of me that believes them,"

She brought her head up then, eyes meeting his before shifting to the side again, glazed with a glassy layer of despair. She pulled her hands away from his and blinked away tears that were threatening to come out, knowing that tears would lead to sympathy and sympathy would lead to more tears.

"I feel like I'm living in a novel that's been created for me, you know? A world woven by the criticisms of others that I circle like I'm the Earth and they're the sun. I'm trying my hardest to follow this script of standards, but I don't feel like I'm myself anymore. I'm trapped in this endless cycle of trying to measure up to these people's expectations, but I'm constantly reminded that, in their eyes, I'm just a good-for-nothing failure with a pretty face,"

Taehyung's heart sank.

"Jisoo, look at me,"

She continued to avoid his stare as he rested his hand on her knee, moving to crouch down in front of her while she hid her face behind a curtain of hair. He took a strand and tucked it behind her ear, holding onto her gaze. Her bottom lip was held between her teeth as she tried to stifle the dam of emotions ready to spill out, hands clenched into fists.

"I know you, Jisoo, and I know that you are so much more than what they say,"

She finally looked at him, a lone tear traced down her cheek and just like that, the floodgates opened. She wept, her dark lashes now brimmed heavy with tears while he took her small hands in his, but still, she did not make a sound as the sadness and sorrow that was inside of her flowed in a steady stream.

"When you do what you love, when it's your focus and passion—you defocus on what others do. So, ignore their comments. Write your own novel. Follow your own script. Do what you love. Screw whatever they have to say about it. Life is just a long cycle of remembering and forgetting, so when things get hard, stop for a while and look back and remember how far you've come. Don't forget how rewarding that is. Don't forget how remarkable you are,"

The gentleness in his voice made the cage in her throat open up, unlocked only by his heartfelt words. They managed to sooth some of the pain that was buried deep inside her, and she was suddenly filled with gratitude. For the first time in a long time, the weight she had felt on her shoulders seemed to be lighter than it was before.

They stayed like that for a while, Taehyung holding onto Jisoo's hands firmly but gently as if to say 'I've got you' as she hiccuped and calmed down. A soft smile graced Jisoo's lips, Taehyung returning her smile before he wiped away at her wet cheeks with the sleeve of his sweater. They didn't need to say anything to one another, their eyes communicating their emotions on their own.

"Thank you," she sniffled, a bit shy after sharing such a personal moment with him.

He gently pulled her to stand up, tugged her hood over her head, and pulled his mask on to cover his face.

"Let's get going,"

He slipped his hand into hers and walked towards the front of the library. Jisoo trailed behind him and looked down at their clasped hands, a mixture of emotions circling her mind.

  
How do you always say the words that I want to hear?

  
a.n.
i decided to time-skip through some of their interactions because they probably would've seemed filler-ish !!

also i know their whole friendship development seems rushed and it seems like jisoo opened up rly quick but it's just in taehyung's personality that gives her a sense of comfort yk? i'll definitely do some heavy editing after this story's finished