A Greater Good (girlxgirl)

Kitchen

The door snapped against the silence. 

Everlyn stood inside the hallway of her parents house and wiped her eyes one last time before taking a deep breath. She could hear everyone talking and laughing outside in the garden, she could imagine them all standing around with bottles of beer and cider among the orange tree flowers - her shiny, drama free family. 

She wanted to stand by the door for the rest of her life, not moving forward in time just listening to the calming murmur of chatter from afar. Something clattered down in the kitchen, she took another deep breath and headed towards the sound hoping to be met with anyone other than James. 

Steph had been cutting up cheese for the salad when the blue of Everlyn's slip dress caught her attention and she looked up to see her little sister peering around the corner, looking glamorously out of place in their old daggy kitchen .

"You're here!" She put down the knife and hugged her.

Everlyn could have dissolved into the hug and left salty stains all over Steph's shirt, but she didn't, she held herself together for the sake of the family, for a greater good. Steph let her go and held her an arms length apart.

"Where've you been?" she asked kindly. "Are you ok?" She was looking into Everlyn's eyes deeply now, trying to work out why her younger sister with a great job and partner was so miserable. 

Everlyn put on a smile. "Oh, yeah, I'm fine." She smiled again. "I'd better go see everyone." She turned to leave and Steph caught her on the shoulder.

"Are you sure you're ok, Lyn? You can tell me."

Everlyn considered telling her what had happened, why she had spent the car trip over wiping her lips again and again to get rid of Jane's lipstick, why she had kept wiping away tears that kept falling. She wanted to explain why she was late and why Jane was driving around the block waiting on the agreed on 20 minutes before coming in. She wanted to break down in tears in Steph's arms and curl up in her childhood bed listening to leaves brush against the window.

But she just smiled again and shook her head. "Everything's fine... Jane's going to be a little late, I think, Clarissa mentioned something."

Steph raised an eyebrow and smirked. "Are those two a thing?"

Everlyn shrugged, she didn't know why she said it, she'd just panicked. "I suppose so."

She smiled at Steph once more before stealing a piece of cheese and walking out to the garden. She passed through the lounge room, still and kind of spooky because of the stillness. Out the window she could she James laughing with her dad looking at ease and happy, excited to be marrying into such an organised, stable family. Everlyn swallowed down nerves and stepped out into the sunlight, James turned around and smiled at her, she returned it.

When I saw Everlyn standing by the kitchen door I knew something had gone on, she was not only late, but I could see she had been crying. Growing up we weren't the closest of sisters, she more hung out with her twin, but we were still close. I knew I'd never get the story out of her no matter how close we were, Everlyn's the most secretive, closed off person in the family and it worried me to think that she could really be struggling with something but still wouldn't tell me. 

As I moved onto cutting the carrots for the risotto my thoughts drifted back to Everlyn, she seemed off for a while even before the engagement. I knew that her and Jane had a fight a while back and for ages after it she was really upset, but she'd come good I thought, she'd moved on. Maybe she's bored, Everlyn was always lots of fun, going out every weekend doing something with Jane before James, he had kind of slowed her down. But wasn't that what relationships did? I felt ashamed that I had never asked Everlyn if she liked her new life and is what too late now because in less than a week she'd be getting married and her new life would just be her life. But lately her attitude was even worse, she was happy when talking about anything but the wedding and then she'd be distracted and vague. Mum hadn't noticed, or Dad and Mark, Ricky had, but he didn't say anything to me.

"Shit!" I'd slipped with the knife and grazed my finger. As I unconsciously moved my finger to my mouth Jane poked her head in the kitchen door and smiled at me.

"Hello in here," she greeted in her flirtatious voice.

Jane was gorgeous, anyone with eyes could tell you that, and by gorgeous, I mean she was really gorgeous, like supermodel material. And funny too, much funnier than James. Ha, maybe I wanted Everlyn to marry Jane instead, or maybe I wanted to marry Jane myself. 

I took my finger out of my mouth and smiled back at her. "Jane! Hi."

Jane wandered into the kitchen and hoisted herself up onto the bench, taking a piece of carrot and crunching down on it. "What's happened?"

"Just a graze," I explained and kept going with the cooking.

"Why have you been banished to the kitchen? Don't tell me you're letting the family enforce gender stereotypes."

"Don't get gay on me, Jane."

She laughed and shrugged. "As long as you don't."

I pushed her knee and shook my head, she was a tease and a flirt but I was glad she was in here to keep me company over anyone else, she was entertaining. I moved to the stovetop and busied myself with the lunch, now she was here I could start heating it up.

"Why were you late?" I asked, wondering if she'd tell me what Everlyn told me.

"Business."

"Really? What kind?"

"Ladies business."

I laughed. "Sure." I turned to her and kept stirring, she was looking out the window at the families mingling. Everlyn was standing stiffly by James's side while they talked to Mark and his wife, Jane's eyes were not moving off Everlyn. "Hey, can I ask you something?"

Jane looked back at me. "Maybe, what is it?"

"It's about Lyn."

"Ok..." Jane said uncertainly.

"I know that you two aren't close anymore, but things are better lately aren't they?"

"Is that the question?"

"No, it's like a pre-question."

"Right," Jane said seriously, she was no longer cheerful and flirty, she was sad and kind of scary. "Ah, yeah, I suppose we've sort of moved on."

"Wedding dress shopping?"

"Is that another pre-question?"

I nodded, Jane sighed.

"No, the bacherlotte party, we cleared things up then."

"Right, well I suppose that's long enough. Has she been kind of distant?"

Jane thought for a while, she looked at me with strong eye contact, it look like she was almost trying to decide something. Finally she smiled and shook her head. "No, why's that?"

I shook my own head, Jane knew something and I could tell it was something big. "No reason."

I turned back around to the stove, the door to the kitchen opened.

"Oh! Hi, Jane, I didn't know you'd arrived." It was Mum.

"Just got in," I heard Jane explain in a borderline polite voice, she knew Mum didn't really like her.

Mum put her hand on my shoulder and squeezed, I turned to her and smiled.

"We're getting a bit hungry, whenever it's ready."

I nodded. "10 minutes."

"Great. I'll get everyone rounded up."

"Just going to the toilet," Jane announced and followed Mum out of the kitchen.

"Wait." Jane poked her head back in, she didn't look as upbeat as when she'd first arrived. "I didn't mean to stir anything up, I'm really sorry."

She shrugged and smiled. "You didn't." And she left, but I could tell that I did.