B.U. | Grizz Visser (The Society)

loose lips

part twelve.

"Grizz," a familiar voice spoke, fear lacing the shaky voice. Becca approached him, a wet rag in hand, reaching out and holding it to the side of his head.

"Becca?" He replied, more in a question sort of tone. He was disoriented, confused, and most of all, anxious. He was anxious to get out of there, to find Sam and to beg his forgiveness. "Where's Sam?"

"He went home. You really scared us," Becca explained, breathing a heavy sigh, "you scared all of us." Grizz could tell she was hesitant to talk about the events of only a few minutes ago.

"He deserved it."

"Whether he deserved it or not," Becca continued, "he's in the back of an ambulance now. You really broke his skull," Becca explained, breathing a heavy sigh, "you didn't have to do that, you know. I'm grateful that you stood up for him but you don't have an obligation to put yourself in harms way like that."

"I care about him," Grizz muttered, reaching for the rag and pressing it to his face. His cuts stung all the more as he pressed harder, suppressing the blood rushing from his head.

"I get that, but he's not your responsibility."

"Responsibility?" Grizz furrowed his brows, his eyes darting to Becca, "I hardly think I'm taking responsibility for him. I'm trying to keep him safe. Becca, those guys already poured fucking coffee all over him before, who's to say they wouldn't have beaten him up the next time? All I did was prevent the potentially inevitable."

Becca paused and lowered her head, processing his words. Grizz was right, he was only protecting Sam, though his quick action and flip to aggression was not something to be taken so lightly. Becca had never seen Grizz act the way he just had, and he wasn't even acknowledging its consequences.

"You're right," Becca replied with a brief grin, followed by extending her hand toward the boy. She stood to her feet. "Let's get out of here, yeah?"

"I need to see Sam," Grizz explained, reaching for Becca's hand and gripping her wrist. Becca pulled up on the boy's arm, raising him off of the floor for a moment, then crashing him back down quickly. Becca chuckled at the exchange, a genuine laugh escaping her lips, causing Grizz to do the same.

"You're gonna have to get yourself up, Big Guy," she laughed, "and shouldn't we clean you up first?"

"No. Sam comes first."

Grizz slowly and steadily stood to his feet, his head spinning from his obvious wound and the alcohol still lacing his veins. As far as bodily control, Grizz hardly had any to begin with, and now was somehow even worse.

The walk back towards campus was quiet and awkward, filled with unspoken words and secrets neither of them were ready to share. Unbeknownst to Grizz and Sam, Becca had run into someone she knew at the party. He was different than she'd remembered, more attractive, and the booze they consumed made him all the more-so. And as things lead to another...

Of course, the fight between Grizz and Chase interrupted it all, in the end.

Grizz was running scenario after scenario in his head, hoping for one of the positive ones to become reality. He wanted to tell Sam he was sorry for scaring him, that he was only trying to protect him, that he cared about him, and that he liked him. Grizz wasn't sure of the repercussions, but he wanted to come out to Sam. He needed him to know how he felt. He needed it just as much as the air he was breathing.

"You look... Nervous," Becca observed, walking alongside him toward the Sienna Residences. "He might've been shaken up but he knows you meant well."

"I'm gay and I think I might be in love with him," Grizz blurted out, his eyes wide and his breath hitching immediately after the words escaped his lips. He turned to Becca, his expression like a deer in the headlights of oncoming traffic.

"Y—" Becca pondered his words, "what?" she attempted to continue, "since when are you... You know? And Sam?! H-How long has this— I've known you for so long and you never?"

"You're the only person who knows, Becca. Only you." Grizz spoke slowly, his eyes fixated on his own feet.

"Not even Allie?" Becca was more than surprised.

"Not even Allie."

Becca nodded, knitting her brows together to think, "And Sam... You're in love with him?"

"That's what I said." Grizz grew evermore uncomfortable with this conversation.

"Okay, okay, just checking," Becca sighed, sensing the boy's dread at their current conversation. "This is a surprise."

"Is it?" Grizz expressed mockingly.

"I mean, come on. You weren't exactly gay like, an hour ago. What about that girl at the party?"

Grizz huffed and crossed his arms over his chest, "she kissed me. I was drunk and I got confused and those fucking guys were pushing her to do it and... I don't know."

"Oh," Becca replied, nodding, "Well I really had no idea, so..."

"I guess I'm good at keeping secrets."

"But you're not!" Becca exclaimed, lightly hitting Grizz's arm, "ninth grade I told you I had a crush on Luke and you blabbed literally next period. How the hell you kept this for so long is beyond me."

"Oh yeah," Grizz deeply chuckled with a grin, "and Luke was horrified. He hadn't even hit puberty yet."

"Not the point."

The two approached the Sienna Residence and stopped in their tracks, both staring at the menacing brick face. Grizz wasn't sure what to expect, and Becca was nervous for him.

"What do I say, Becs?" Grizz asked, taking a deep breath. The pit in his stomach doubled in size, reaching up into his throat. He felt like he might projectile vomit in Sam's face. That would certainly make things better. Not.

"You've always been good with words, Grizz," Becca tried to console him, to give him a bit of a pep talk, "just speak from your heart. All that cliché bullshit. Sam's a gush for that sort of thing."

Grizz chuckled at her remark. "You had me at hello," Grizz murmured, raising his eyebrows quickly two times, smirking.

"Oh my God," Becca shook her head, "please no... I just mean, I don't know. Tell him how you feel. Get it all out there. If you don't then you'll regret it forever. I don't want to guarantee anything but I know he loves spending time with you and you make him happy. Whether he wants to date you or not, you've got him in your life."

"Date me..." Grizz spoke to himself, baffled by the statement. He hadn't entirely thought this through. He'd never dated anyone before, at least, not for real. Not someone he truly cared for. "Yeah, you're right. Whatever he wants."