fake | tratie | EDITING |

| vii. girlfriend material |

edited: 2 . 4 . 22

original word count: 1565

new word count: 1912

. . .

"Oh, look, the two lovebirds!"

I shut my eyes and let out a long breath.

Travis grasped at my hand, interlocking our fingers. "Just ignore her."

As she came closer and a group of campers gathered to see the awaited spectacle, I whispered, "Looks like that isn't an option."

"So it's true," Ashley spat, crossing her arms. Her lackeys stood behind her, making the same facial expression of disgust. "Travis, I don't know how you confused Katie and me, but you must have. I'm the one you should be with."

I hated anxiety.

The way my heart skipped beats and then made up for them all in an unhealthy span, how I couldn't focus on anything in sight... panic rose up my throat at the thought of everyone staring. It flooded my veins, threatened to take hold of my min. If I could just take some deep breaths, it would all be okay.

"I think I know what's best for me, thanks." Travis stood firm, and it almost made me feel better about the situation.

"He's only with you to make me jealous. You know that, right?" She got in my face and lowered her voice to a dangerous lash. "He'd never actually want to be with you, you're delusional if you think he does."

My brain lost all motive for making a comeback - my vision blurred, and my lungs heaved. I swear, if I have a panic attack in front of her...

Travis put himself in between Ashley and me, his character shifting from calm to assertive. "If I wanted to be with you, I'd have been with you by now. You've asked me a million times, and I say no every time. You just sound desperate."

Her eyes shot daggers over his shoulder at me, but she covered up her hatred with a forced smile. "Travie, you know I didn't mean any of that. I'm really happy for you two, maybe you'll last a whole week before you break up!"

With that, she spun around and let her hair smack Travis in the face before striding away.

As the crowd dispersed, he wordlessly put an arm around me and led me to an unoccupied blanket. He helped me sit before joining me. I let the air of the late summer cool my face, and even though I felt hot it wasn't stuffy when Travis draped an arm over my shoulders. Trying to focus on anything but my anxiety, I pulled my knees up to my chest and squeezed myself into a ball against my fake boyfriend.

It definitely made me upset, how nice it was to just sit there with him after getting so anxious. I decided to blame it on the fact that I always did better after near-panic attacks if I was physically close to someone. Besides, his breathing was a steady pattern and mine instinctively matched his. The sound of demigods laughing and talking, the fireworks exploding periodically in the sky, the possibility of Ashley's evil stare on my back... it all vanished as I fathomed what I was doing.

I was with Travis Stoll, in public, curled up into his side at fireworks.

I was enjoying it.

Suddenly, it was all too much. I shouldn't have liked being in close proximity to a Stoll brother. It just wasn't right. I shifted away from him, and he looked down at me.

"You okay?" He quirked an eyebrow, a face that was far too attractive for me to admit. To be safe, he lifted his arm off me. He probably thought I was going to smack him or something.

I thought about doing so briefly, if not for the fact that I missed the weight of his hand against my shoulder. So, I kept my gaze trained on the plaid blanket we sat on. "I just... don't know if I can deal with this."