Alter Egos

Hiraeth

Hiraeth: (n.) a homesickness for a home to which you cannot return, or that maybe never was.

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Description: In the wake of the impending Crisis, Caitlin vanishes alongside Barry. Now, trapped in an utterly fabricated and eerily perfect reality, the pair must learn to live together and adjust to their new life in the Speed Force, as well as the ramifications of what lay beyond.

Anyway, here's a 16+k fic of pure domestic fluff that nobody asked for. This is the longest one-shot I've ever written. Shout out to ArtemisSnowChase thank you so much for all your input and help planning this fic! Also just a heads up, in an attempt to avoid overcomplicating dynamics, Caitlin's/Frost's personalities won't be strictly divided in this fic. Sorry if this is in any way disappointing to any readers.

WARNING: May contain intense amounts of domesticity and graphic depictions of hand-holding. As well as, but not limited to, gross overuse of italics and semicolons. Viewer discretion is advised.

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If asked, Caitlin Snow wasn't sure if she could pinpoint the exact moment her decision had been made. It happened gradually, like the sun slowly rising over a city.

To the outside observer, it probably seemed like a snap judgment, a spur of the moment calculation made by a weary soul who couldn't bring herself to lose anybody else. But, truthfully, the resolve had entered her mind long before the actual date arrived.

It had begun when Barry had admitted to her how scared he truly was to 'vanish in the crisis'. When he had broken down in the quiet of her med bay one night and said he wasn't ready to leave everyone and everything he loved behind; even if he knew he'd make the same decision every time. In that moment, Caitlin had made a silent vow to herself; either she was going to stop it from happening, or she was going to go with him. He didn't deserve any of this, he didn't deserve to be adrift and alone. She was going to make sure he wasn't, even if she didn't understand how yet.

So naturally, when the Crisis inevitably arrived and the angry red sky rumbled above them, Caitlin made sure to stick as close to Barry as possible, on and off the battlefield. In the end, she found herself standing next to the Flash, Eobard Thawne's strained and ragged laughs drifting through the air.

"You're done, Thawne," Barry said through gritted teeth, kneeling above the battered body of the other speedster.

Eobard's laughter only intensified, his shoulders shaking from the mirth of whatever it was he found so funny.

"Did you really think," he gasped out, "it was just a coincidence that the sky was Flash red?"

Barry froze in place, eyes drifting to the crackling crimson storm above them. Suddenly, he reached forward and grabbed Eobard by the collar, yanking him up to face him.

"What did you do?" Barry bit out.

Eobard only smiled through blood-stained teeth, allowing his head to lull back a little under the Flash's hold.

"I didn't have to do anything, that's the beauty of it. Realities are colliding, Flash, the Speed Force has been torn open," he explained in an easy, low tone. "And if you want even a chance at stopping it or salvaging any form of reality, you're going to have to make a sacrifice."

"What does that mean?" Caitlin spoke up from beside Barry, willing her voice to remain firm and steady.

The Reverse Flash's gaze slid to her, a familiar kind of fondness in his eyes. The same way he used to look at her and Cisco when they solved a particularly difficult problem. It made her feel uneasy, the old sting of betrayal clawing it's way back to the surface.