BOSS [+18]

35. Times are changing

Hey guys, I told you I was back and here it is one more chapter. I hope you guys like it, it's a little different to see Jared's perspective on this situation. Enjoy :)

Jared's POV

June, 2017

The light hits my face and I curse internally knowing that I have to wake up just wishing I could stay here for longer. But not today. Today me Shannon and Tomo have to work on the studio and I just don't feel like it.

"Get a grip man it's been over a year she's not coming back" my subconscious yells at me. Why can't I just face it?

The fact is I can't. I tried to keep it together for the rest of the tour after she left and I'm glad my professional side spoke louder back then. But after that I just fell apart completely. I just can't accept the fact I screwed this up so badly because of my fucking temper, that I lost the only thing that actually mattered in this world to me.

It might sound weird me Jared even think about those things but Harper changed my life completely and I was just a sucker who couldn't change a little bit for her as well and now I lost her.

After the tour was ended I tried to look for her everywhere, her old apartment, friends (Rachel refused to say a word), job but nothing she just missed completely, she changed her phone and was completely gone like she never existed. But the fact is that she did existed and I couldn't forget her. When I arrived home and was looking for something from her I found nothing but a little polaroid picture with the words:

"Memories from a happy time" Harper 05/2016

She signed this when she left and this completely killed me inside.

And since then I'm here locked in my cave hiding from reality, just trying to keep the appearances for my band and my acting career but apart that I'm just here. I don't feel like doing anything anymore, not without her, not with this guilt I carry on my shoulders for the mistakes I've done.

I get up from my bed groaning going to the bathroom and I stare myself in the mirror, it's like I can't even recognize the person on the reflection. My beard grew so much as my hair and I couldn't care less of how I was looking.

This might sound so stupid. Me Jared Leto, a former manwhore that always got his way on everything with the ladies now suffering because of a girl. Sometimes I don't even understand myself to be honest, but it is what it is, and it's not going back any sooner.

Shannon just came back from Seattle and Tomo from Detroit and we're meeting at the studio to work on new music, at least this will totally distract me.

I arrive at the studio and they're already there waiting for me, which is odd since I'm always the first to arrive. I greet them and we start to work on a new single that we want to release very soon since the fans are flipping out already.