𝙨𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙩 𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨【 𝙣𝙖𝙧𝙪𝙩𝙤 → 𝙊𝙉𝙀𝙎𝙃𝙊𝙏𝙎 】

Akatsuki x reader - I'm back

I did this outta complete boredom. Don't judge.

"[Y/n]! You're back, un!" Deidara grinned at you.

You took a deep bow. "Indeed I am, Dei-sama. Miss me?"

He swatted your head. "Shut up. I'm your best friend, hm."

"Well then, how come you haven't given me a hug yet?" You stretched your arms out, pouting. He fell into them, laughing. "You're as stupid as ever."

You pushed him away. "Ungrateful bomb boy."

"What are you doing back so early, bitch?" A slap on your back verified that Hidan was indeed the presence behind you.

You grabbed his wrist and judo-flipped him into the wall before his hand strayed anywhere more personal. "The guy I needed to kill died of a heart attack."

"Did he now?" Sasori mused from his corner of the common room. "What a coincidence."

"Yeah, it is, doll boy."

He eyed you distastefully. "Don't call me that."

"See, it's a bit too late now for me to start listening to you, don't you think?" You gave him your cheekiest grin. Oh, how you enjoyed watching the puppet man gnash his teeth.

Kisame barked out a laugh, from where he was lounging on his sofa. "Indeed it is, [Y/n]. Oh, by the way, have you seen Itachi yet?"

"Nah. Is he expecting me?" You dumped your bags onto the sofa, right on top of Kisame, who yelped and shoved them away.

Kakuzu snorted, not bothering to look up from his stacks of money. "Itachi expects nobody. But they come anyway."

"True," you nodded. "Guess I'd better get to work annoying the shit outta him."

"Itachi-senpai is scared by nobody, [Y/n]-chan! Did [Y/n]-chan bring back any candy? Tobi promises that Tobi was a good boy!" A certain mask-wearing man-child popped out of nowhere.

"Good boy, my ass," Deidara grumbled. "He annoyed the hell out of us all day, every day, un!"

You laughed, handing the masked man a bagful of sweets. "All yours, Tobi. Now scram, before Dei chucks clay at you."

"Damn right," muttered said blond, tossing a lump of clay back and forth between his hands. Tobi grabbed the candy and sprinted out, chanting your praises at the top of his (very loud) voice.

"Oh. You're back." You spun around at the sound of the new voice.

"Leader-sama!" You bobbed your head. "The target died of a heart attack before I had the chance to kill them. Which is why I'm back early."

Pein's face showed no expression. "Interesting. Submit your mission report to me or Konan by midnight tomorrow."

"Goddamn paperwork," You grumbled at Pein's retreating back. "The bane of my existence."

"You say that for everything that irritates you," pointed out a smooth voice.

"And last but not the least, I've-got-a-giant-stick-up-my-ass Uchiha!" You clapped slowly, wearing a manic grin.

Itachi scowled at you from the doorway. "Why haven't I killed you yet?"

You winked. "Because you loooooove me. So damn hard."

He gave your exaggerated kissy faces a look of disgust and disappeared immediately.

Kisame snickered. "New record, [Y/n]."

You took a bow so deep that you nearly fell over. "Thank you, fellow criminals, for your undying support in helping me annoy Itachi!"

Deidara steadied you. "Watch it, un."

"Thanks." You made your way over to Sasori's sofa and plopped down. He gave you the usual side-eye.

"Get off."

You stuck out your tongue. "Make me, doll boy."

"Fine." He shoved you off the sofa, much to the amusement of the others.

"Shaddup!" You growled, bouncing back up immediately and giving Sasori a kick to the head. He didn't flinch. Or even look affected.

"I'm a puppet. Your taijutsu does nothing to me."

You gritted your teeth. "Fine, doll boy. Puppet this!"

And in a flash, Sasori was under your favourite type of genjutsu; the type you usually saved for annoying civilians, pathetic rogues who dared to challenge you, and......annoying Akatsuki members.

Whatever he saw had him twitching oddly with widened eyes, so you took that as a sign of a job well done.

"What's the genjutsu, un?" questioned Deidara.

You smirked. "The world shunning his art for yours."

"Awesome!" The ex-Iwa-nin clapped with excitement, and then fell into gloom. "Too bad it isn't reality, un..."

You ruffled his hair. "It will be. Someday. You'll see."

Like I said. Don't judge, please.

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