Stuck With Him

Chapter twenty - five [ 25 ]

Chapter twenty - five: Guess What? I Am Not A Robot

You know what is one of the first things you have to learn when becoming famous?

Never. Ever. Ever. Ever. Google. Yourself.

I'm not even sure how it came to be. Why I clicked on a link someone sent me via Twitter. I just did. I was bored because Mason had gone to Rosedale to pick up stuff he left behind (I swear that boy would forget his head if it weren't rather tightly stuck on his neck) and Nana and Papi had some guests over. They were old friends from Portugal so I knew the night would be filled with endless anecdotes that I had nothing to do with.

I wasn't that bummed about my solitude because before the guests arrived Nana had spent a great amount of time trying to squeeze out the reason I broke up with Alex of me so a little me-time was fine by me.

Besides, my Portuguese was pretty rusty. My parents had only spoken English to me despite being bilingual themselves to make sure I wouldn't be the weird kid who didn't speak the language. So I wouldn't be them or rather whom they had been when they were kids. Neither of them had known English very well when they went to pre-school and they had been ostracized by the other kids. They had no one else to talk to so they stuck together and that never changed, not even after they learned English and were able to socialize with the others.

Only Nana and Papi spoke Portuguese to me so it had never perfectly caught on. I knew that I'd be utterly lost in a conversation featuring four native speakers and me so I had opted out of dinner, much to Nana's displeasure but she'd just have to manage. I had properly greeted their guests so she couldn't be full-on pissed at me.

Due to the guests I was trapped in my old room and lacking anything better to do I pulled out my laptop and started scrolling. I'm not much for social media which gives Mary eternal headache because apparently you're supposed to advertise yourself everywhere and sadly I'm just not good at that.

The first hour went by nicely. I just looked at funny pictures, responded to a bunch of messages that had been piling up and ignored a lot of Alex's fans threatening me with knives and stuff. They were not happy that I had dumped their idol which is rather weird because the whole time we were together they had been trying to get me to break up with them.

With threats of knives and such, of course.
But then came the link. It had something that caught my eye, a title that went something along the lines "The Truth About Nalex's Breakup!" I figured I'd get a good laugh out of it and clicked it.

Oh, I should have known better.

I looked at the comments again and bit back tears. I knew it. I fucking knew it. I knew they'd blame this all on me and my 'queen bee coldness', as they saw it. In their mind, I was a stone-hearted bitch who enjoyed making poor Alex's life hell. A robot with no feelings of her own, just out to wreak havoc and destroy any chance at happiness for oh-so-innocent Alex. They never understood that I was just camera- shy and not used to such amount of attention. They always saw me as someone completely different and never even considered the fact that I am human, not a mannequin who can always smile on command.

And that's when my best friend decided to bust in, closely followed by Jax who started to set up the camera and lights in the room next to mine like Mason told him to.

Then my best friend turned to me. "Okay, Harper, we're super duper busy so let's get going. We have a thingy to film and you're going to help, oh awesome singer friend", he listed not noticing my bad mood at all. "And oh, I brought Jax too because we sort of need a cameraman for the skit because you and I have to be in the shot and I'm not trusting this expensive as fuck camera to your Nana, no offence."

"She's pretty much your Nana, too", I said for no particular reason although it was true. I just needed to respond somehow but I wasn't ready to get up just yet.

Mason grinned widely. He loves getting included in my family because his family isn't much fun. Bunch of hypocrite conservative elitist morons. How they managed to birth such awesomeness that is Mason, I will never understand but I'm sure sonme sort of dark magic went on behind the scenes. "Oh, I wish. I love Mrs F, she's the bomb. My grandma is just a whiny old bitch."

"Maisie, manners", I warned although I 100% agreed. His grandmother from his dad's side was a complete bitch and his mother's mother was dead so we would never know what she was like. She had lived one hell of a life though, running with wolves and climbing Mount Everest. Hate to say it, but if I had to choose she would have been the one I would have liked to know better.

Mason growled in frustration but duck his head nonetheless. "Uh, whatever. So about the skit", he said and started to explain a long and detailed mess of a script to me that we had to improve MANY times. Mason has awesome ideas but struggles to put them to words and that's where I come in.

We were almost done filming but my singing part was still unfinished. I had to come up with a song, any song to sing while Mason would act crushed because in the skit he tries his best to tell a girl he's in love with her but it never works out and in the end he tries to woo her by singing his feelings to her which makes her run and hide with her hands on her ears. Because - I'm sorry but this can't emphasized enough - MASON OLIVER KING CAN'T SING TO SAVE HIS LIFE, LET ALONE TO CHARM A GIRL.

"Have you decided on the song yet?" Mason asked just then.

"Yup", I replied curtly, those effing Alex fans' comments going around and round in my head like in a carousel. I bet they'd love knowing that their words do get to me even if I don't show it. I wish there was a way I could make them understand that I'm not a fucking robot they can keep putting down just to make themselves feel better.

And that's when it finally hit me. "Pass me that guitar, won't you."

"You look really mad. What's wrong?" Jax asked when Mason and I joined him in the room next to mine that acted as a study 90% of time but apparently also moonlighted as a set for a cafe. Jax seemed to have a talent for decorating because the room no longer looked like a study but an edgy. hipsterish quiet little cafe.

I waved them both off. "Nothing's wrong. Let's roll", I said and without a further a do sat down in the chair assigned to me and started playing. I had just started learning guitar (taught by Alex, unfortunately, so my lessons were a bit on a pause) but Marina and the Diamonds' song I Am Not A Robot doesn't have too many chords and isn't that hard to play.

I started singing and didn't even struggle to remember the words even though I hadn't listened to the song in years. But I felt every lyric burn me like singing the words would brand them into my skin.

You've been acting awful tough lately

Smoking a lot of cigarettes lately

But inside, you're just a little baby, oh.

It's okay to say you've got a weak spot

You don't always have to be on top

Better to be hated than loved, loved, loved for what you're not

You're vulnerable, you're vulnerable

You are not a robot

You're lovable, so lovable

But you're just troubled

Guess what? I'm not a robot

❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀❀

Hahahaha, I decide to put that song. On top ^^

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Much love,

Ida 💋