You || Krii7y

8. Drowning Worries

Twenty-four hours later and John has made no effort with Jaren. Yeah, Jaren hasn't tried to contact him either, but he wasn't the one who had snapped for no reason. The only person who'd called him today was Mini to ask if he wanted to play later with some of the guys. Jaren is running low on content and so he'd accepted Craig's invitation.

He hangs up and sighs. He'd never felt nervous about being in the same place as John and yet here he is, worrying about being in the same call as him. He's overreacting - John just hadn't had the chance to apologise. He'd get into the call and John would call him a pussy for being late. And Jaren would fire back saying he'd rather be late than ugly, not that he'd actually mean the insult.

No such thing happens when Jaren joins the call.

"Smii7y my boy! We thought you wouldn't turn up," Mini laughs.

"Ello ello," Ohm offers.

"...and then I woke up covered in peanut butter," Panda finishes. "Oh hi Smii7y."

Jaren spies John's name in the call but receives no greeting and he feels his face fall. Maybe yesterday wasn't just a bad day for them.

"Hey," he mutters. No one notices how off he sounds and he's partially grateful for that. He doesn't want to draw attention to how much he cares about John and how much he affects him. They play golf and John is just as loud and obnoxious as he usually is, except he completely ignores Jaren's existence. Even when Jaren's golf ball falls in front of John's, where he would normally hit it with all of his strength, he instead waits patiently for a defeated Jaren to move his ball.

"How was your date, John?" Mini asks.

Jaren feels himself hold his breath as he waits for John's response.

"It was great," he chuckles. That alone is more than Jaren had really gotten when he'd asked. And yet, John continues. "We went to a restaurant near mine and talked. She's really fun. I saw her yesterday too and I- I like her a lot."

"That's great! I'm really glad you seem to have enjoyed yourself," Ohm muses.

"Thanks Ohm. I did enjoy myself, even though I saw her two days in a row," John adds. Jaren feels a physical weight drop in his chest and coughs.

"I'm going to go now guys. I forgot I have something to do. I'll catch you later." He doesn't wait for their responses before exiting the lobby and the call.

What is John doing? This is torture and half of Jaren wants to call and confront him right now. Why couldn't he have spoken to Jaren like he just had to the others? Why had he snapped at him when he'd simply asked the same question Mini had? It's fine though. John can do what he wants. He can go fuck himself for all he cares. It's not like their friendship is one of the best things in Jaren's life.

He tries not to waste his time thinking about John and instead gets ready for the party Fitz had told him about. He'll go to give himself a break from life. He just wants to get shit-faced and not think about John and what an asshole he is.

**************************

An hour later and Jaren is at the front gate of a modestly expensive house. He hadn't been sure if he was at the right place but the bright lights and booming music are evidence enough that he is. He takes a deep breath and walks in.

The first thing he notices is how many people there are here. He can barely walk in a straight line without someone slamming into him. He feels his breathing quicken and wants to leave before his eyes catch a glimpse of John's head. Against his will, his breathing calms and he feels his panicked thoughts quieten. He wishes John didn't have this effect on him but years of having him there by his side can't be overcome by a quarrel.

Next to John stands Kasey, looking beautiful. She doesn't compare to John though, whose normally wild hair has been tamed in a messy, no-effort way. He is dressed in a button-up shirt and black jeans and is smiling as he holds a red cup, looking around. Jaren ducks his head before he can see him and walks to a table filled with drinks.

He isn't here to look at or think about John. He's here to party. It's unfortunate that John has to be here but it is what it is. Jaren picks up a bottle of an unknown, copper-coloured liquid and pours himself a glass. He throws his head back as he downs it and squints when it burns his throat. It tastes awful but one gulp has dimmed his thoughts already. What had he been worrying about? Who knows. He's here to have fun.