Glitter Glue

Are You...OK?

Waiting outside her door, I thought just once more how crazy I was for trying this and I stepped inside. Mom was laying on her bed staring at the ceiling and she stood up stiffly when she noticed me coming in. All I did was go stand in front of her and she flinched. It was as if she was mortified, although I can't recall what I could have done to frighten her to this degree.

"Mom...," I should have thought of something to follow that up, but instead I just stood there awkwardly watching her diverting eyes,"Mom, are you... ok?" I knew she wasn't ok. No one really was in the world then, but I think she was much worse off then tons of people.

Mom twitched a bit at those words. She opened her mouth and then closed it.

I just went and sat in her rocking chair and waited. We stayed like that for ages until Mom, quite by accident, looked me in the eyes.

"Mom are you ok?," I was more confident luckily for me.

I watched a silent tear roll down her face and listened as she opened her mouth only to let out a cautious " I'm fine thank you" and then she just laid

back on her bed.

Only then did I realize that she was worse off than even I thought. By standing up to her and sticking her gaze, I intimidated her and she hadn't gotten over it. It would take a while. I could see that, no matter how tiny of a bit she showed, she needed someone to help her through as Thomas was doing for me without knowing. If I could get her to open up to me, I would help her into her feet. Sometimes, she does frighten me more than anything, she's only a woman trying to keep a good grip on her quick growing children. She would understand.

.................

When I opened the door and walked out of Mom's room I almost ran straight over Thomas. His eyes shine brighter than the moon as he gazed at me. He was holding Blip, his stuffed rhinoceros. The monkey had been listening at the door.

"Thomas what are you doing, silly goose?"

"Well... I was NOT listening! I was just going to... look at the pictures... on the wall..."

"Thomas......"

He seemed to burst with excitement,"Why didn't she yell!!! You are not in trouble?"

I shushed him and pulled him to my room. His chubby face watched me intently.

"Do you remember what we said about 'broken'?"

"Yeah! Why?"

"Mommy is scared and she needs a buddy"

"Are YOU her buddy?"

"Shhh! No not yet, but I think we should both be Mommy's buddy"

"What if she gets mad?"

"It's ok, she'll get better."

So, we allied together to fix a few pieces. Mom needs us even if she doesn't show it. Thomas and I are on a mission to get Mom some glitter glue and no one's gonna stop us from fixing her because I know how it feels.