Beauty School Drop Out

XV

What am I going to do? What am I going to tell Blue? How the fuck do I get her body out of here? Oh my god oh my god oh my god.

I shakily reached for my phone and dialed 999. I held the phone up to my ear and waiting for someone to answer.

"999, what's your emergency?
"H-Hi... my girlfriend just got home a-and she fell a-and she hit her head. I-I need an ambulance..."
"Okay, sir, what's your address?"
"Seventy-two Cobblestone Lane."
"And your name?"
"Phil Lester."

The woman froze.

"Hello?"
"S-Sorry, big fan. The ambulance is on their way."
"Thank you."

I set my phone down and stared at Cynthia. My eyes practically bulged out of my head. I was useless. I did this to her. Blue no longer has a mother.

Mum is calling...

"Hello?" I mumbled.
"Hi, honey. Blue and I are on our way back, so–"
"No!"
"No? Why not?"
"Cyn, um... Cyn tripped a-and smacked her head on the kitchen island..." I lied. "She's not doing too well. I-I honestly don't even know if she's still alive..."
"Did you call someone?"
"Yeah, an ambulance and police should be on their way. I don't know what to do, mum," I sobbed. "I-I don't want to be blamed for this..."
"You won't be if she just tripped. How did you find her?"
"I was in the studio, then I heard her scream, then a thud, and I ran out to find her, well... dead..." I lied right through my teeth.
"We'll-We'll figure something out... just get her the help she needs."
"Okay, I will."

End Call.

"999! Open up!"

I ran to the door and let everyone in.

"She's in the kitchen," I said as I dried my eyes.
"What happened?"
"Sir," a cop cut the paramedic off, "have you been drinking?"
"Of course I have! I think my girlfriend is fucking dead!"
"Deal with him later," the paramedic said, "Sir, what happened?"

***

"Bye, bye baby blue," I softly sang. I held him up against my chest as he dozed off to sleep. His arms were lazily slug around my neck as I held him close to me. "I wish you could see the wicked truth... caught up in a rush, it's killing you... dreaming at the sun when we were us... fingers in a fist like you might run..."

A tear slowly dripped down my face.

"I settle for a ghost I never knew... super paradise I held on to, but I settle for a ghost..."
"Daddy?" Blue whispered.
"Yeah, baby boy?"
"Is mummy going to be okay?"
"I don't know," I lied.
"Can I at least tell mummy goodnight? And that I love her? And so I can get a goodnight kiss?"

Tears streamed down my face as I held him tighter.

"Mummy's gone, baby boy..." I choked out.
"But why? Why isn't she coming back?"
"She got hurt... she's gonna be asleep forever now..."
"Oh," he whispered.
"Do you want to write her a letter? She can keep it under her pillow when she sleeps."
"I can do that..."
"Okay." I placed a kiss on his head. "I'm sorry, Blue..."
"Don't be sorry, daddy. It's not your fault."

Only if he knew...

***

Trending: Phil Lester, of 'Phil and the Diamonds' was recently widowed when his girlfriend of seven years passed away. How will the now single father bring up his son Blue?

"Baby Blue?" I called as I set down my phone.
"Yes, daddy?"
"Is mummy's letter ready yet?" He nodded. "Are you all set to go?"
"Yes."
"Okay."

I scooped him up and headed for my car. We drove off to Cynthia's funeral, and the crowd of people there was absolutely unbelievable. I put on my sunglasses, got Blue out of the car, held him against me, and walked into the service. People were calling my name, trying desperately to get my attention. Countless people were snapping their cameras as they tried capturing our despair.

I walked quicker.

No one needed the face of a murderer on their phone.

The service was quite lovely—all our friends and family were there paying their respects. I tried to keep my speech short, and I even let Blue say a few words. By the end, everyone was lining up to get one last look at her beautiful face. I walked Blue up so he could slip the note under her pillow. He placed a kiss on her cheek and whispered a bye mummy before stepping away.

Tears ran down my pale face as I took in every last bit of her. I smiled to myself when I truly admired all the traits she passed down to Blue. Her slightly tanned skin, her pretty pink lips, and her cute button nose. She helped make him so perfect... and she had to throw it away the second fucking time.

Shit, stop! Now's not the time, Lester. Hold it together.

***

A month or so passed after Cynthia died. Blue was starting to get back to normal and learning how to live his life without a mum. I'd give that boy anything—I'd give anything to have Cynthia back, just so he could have his mum.

One night, I was lying alone in bed, coming down from one of my highs... just thinking to myself. I picked up my phone, scrolled through my contacts, and without hesitation, hit call.

"Hello?" the groggy voice answered.
"Hi... you free?"
"I'm sleeping. What the hell do you want?"
"Sex..."
"Lester, it's two in the morning."
"Yeah, and? Pump some blow into you and get on over here."
"What? No, I-I've been sober for a couple months. No point in throwing that away."
"Awe, come on Baby Blue. Come over and have some fun."
"I thought I wasn't your baby blue anymore. Just a 'beauty school drop out shmuck'."
"Things change."
"Oh what? Like your girlfriend dying?"
"Don't fucking throw that in my face."
"Night, Phil."
"Dan, come on. I know you want to. Besides? You ever fall asleep on a king size bed with sheets imported from Egypt?"
"No... no I haven't..."
"Come on over, baby. I'll leave the door open for you."