Why is it that now that I have found happiness I am still sad
Why is it that now that I have someone who loves all my imperfections Im still feeling unloved
He treats me right and does everything he can to make me happy which I'm so grateful for yet I'm still unsatisfied
When I'm with him or my family I'm the happiest but once I'm alone even for a minute I become so sad
When I'm alone I can feel the darkness consuming my body and at times I let it overcome me
When the darkness takes over my childhood memories flash rapidly through my mind
Oddly enough they aren't the good memories in fact I can hardly ever remember a time that I was happy as a child
Growing up was hard for me
At a young age I was exposed to drugs and alcohol abuse and even with numerous try's to shield my brother and I my mother seemed to never win
No matter how hard she tried we always ended up running away to one of many of our hiding places and some times we didn't have a place to go so we drove around town aimlessly until morning came
I believe that's when I was introduced to the darkness
I have never really been normal because I was always afraid and thanks to my father we were almost always running
I've come to notice that the darkness visits me more frequently now than it ever has and while as a child the darkness led me to believe I wanted to kill myself and or do bodily harm it now taunts me with flashbacks making me relive all the nights I wish to forget
I don't know why the darkness won't leave me alone it seems to be aggressively consuming me more and more each day and I feel like soon I will succumb to its demands.
YOU ARE READING
Poems
Ngẫu nhiênThis is just a rough draft of some poems I have been writing, if there are some misspelling of words please for give me because like I said this is just a rough draft .
