Books, Boys, and Basketball: Junior Year

THE QUESTION

For my latest therapy session, I have to make a list of people I need to make amends with and explain how I'm going to do it. Then I have to go home and do it.

The first is my attorneys in the Candor case. My not showing up in court hurt my case, putting all the good I was trying to do in jeopardy. I still have friends who, depending on how my case goes, would either end up back in Candor or be set free. I need to honor my promise to them. So, the next day when my new court date comes around, I keep my word and tell the truth. Regardless of what threat will be waiting for me.

As much as I fear for me and Grams, I can't let Candor walk away like that. Not after what they did to me and so many other helpless girls.

After hearing my testimony, the news goes into a frenzy. And my issues with Candor make headlines once again. I become the poster girl for the smear campaign against Candor and its founders, which I'm not entirely comfortable with. I cringe every time I see my face on television. I'd much rather it be for my skills on the basketball court than my drama with Candor.

Next on my list are my parents. So, I stop by to see my dad who looks happier than I've seen him in a long time. He looks as if a weight has been lifted off his shoulders. But he and my mom are still going through it. He can't get over what she did not once, but twice now, and the D-word keeps coming up.

Then there's my DNA donor. I've been getting to know him and allowing him to take me to dinner. We talk openly and honestly about our lives, trying to establish some bond with one another. And when I tell him about the things my dad did to me, he becomes visibly upset to the point of shaking.

Last, there's Quincy and Chloe. I dropped Q like a bad habit for Drew, and he's been salty about it ever since. So, I apologize. I apologized for ignoring his feelings for me and for pushing Chloe on him.

Not that he's been complaining...

With Chloe, I apologize for kissing Quincy and betraying our friendship. She's already over it and tells me she and Quincy are just friends with benefits, anyway. This entire time I thought they were dating, but they've both made it very clear he isn't over me just yet.

GREAT...

As if I don't feel like crap already.

Christmas is coming up real soon, and it takes forever to find the perfect gift for Drew, my friends, and my family.

I won't be spending Christmas with Grams, though. She made plans with her new boyfriend and she'll be out of town. Not wanting me to be alone, she lets me invite my friends over to spend the night. But she makes me promise not to sleep with Drew in her house. I agree because it's the only way she'll allow it to happen, but honoring that promise is easier said than done. Drew is already talking about all the things he plans to do to me.

For Christmas Eve, Grams and I spend the day together opening gifts and eating like queens. She and I both leave the house at around seven the next morning, and I head over to my donor's house to open gifts. I meet my stepmom Mia, and my half-brother Sean too.

"I've always wanted a daughter, but we found out we couldn't have any more kids after Sean was born," Mia tells me.

What I want to tell her is, I'm not, nor will I ever be, her daughter. But I hold my tongue instead. Sean is excited to have a big sister and I don't want to hurt his feelings. Mia is excited to have another female in the house too, and I don't want to ruin their Christmas like I ruined Drew's Thanksgiving, with my bad attitude.

"I hear you're pretty good with a basketball," Mia smiles. "You got it honest, I guess, with your dad being in the NBA and all."

A record skips somewhere in my head. "Wait, what?" I look at my donor. "You're in the NBA?"