Wallflower

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Chapter 16: La Fille Qui a Brisé Le Coeur de Carson Armani

"Where have you been?" Carson closed Avery's locker, seeming to suddenly appear out of nowhere. The freckled girl jumped in her spot and held her books to her chest.

"In class," she responded slowly, deciding to play coy. Technically, it wasn't a fib; she really had been in class all day. Her friend's lips tugged down into a slight frown as he looked on at her.

"Stop," he said tiredly, reaching out his hand to lay on her shoulder, "You know what I mean. The last time we spoke you came out to me, then you had a panic attack later on. I'm concerned for you Aves."

When she didn't respond and kept her eyes trained on her shoes, he continued, "Did you tell your parents and they didn't take it so well? If that's the case then you can talk to me, we're best friends. I'll be here for you no matter what."

Hearing Carson's words of compassion made her feel even worse about her situation. How did she even end up in this mess? Why didn't she just tell the truth from the beginning?

It was like a dam had burst and tears fell from her eyes, cascading down her cheeks and eventually dripping onto the tiled floor.

Avery had so badly just wanted to say 'I've been lying to you. Alex and I are dating and I don't tutor her in French. I had a panic attack because one of her friends called me out. I'm a horrible person and I don't deserve you'. So she did because she couldn't take the guilt and pain anymore.

Avery told him everything.

Right there, in the middle of the hallway. Heart beating too fast and mind racing too quickly to pay attention to the peers that had crowded around them.

She watched as his face contorted into different expressions as she revealed the whole story, exposed the omissions and clarified the lies. When she was done, the new expression on his face was almost unreadable, but what was written in his eyes was a look she'd never forget. Pain. And it was all her fault. She was the one causing him this pain.

Her high from yesterday evening came crashing down.

"So how long has this been going on for?" he cleared his throat after he asked his question, but Avery didn't miss the crack in his voice when he did.

"Early November," she whispered. That was the day when she and Alex had gone to get Milo and the brunette had learned about her anxiety disorder, jumpstarting their friendship.

"It's the middle of December now," he said, mainly to himself. He was still trying to wrap his head around the fact that his best friend had been lying to him for about a month now. She was getting close to someone she knew he wouldn't have approved of and tried to cover it up. Carson and Alex were popular (albeit for different reasons), which meant they saw each other at parties and bonfires and occasionally spoke to each other. He had never known Alex to be girlfriend material; she had had many suitors but would never hold on to one.

If Avery had come to him about her feelings then he could have told her that and advised her not to get romantically involved with someone like Alex. But she didn't. Instead, she lied to him. He wouldn't have gone through the trouble of asking the freckled girl for her blessing of his relationship with Marigold if he had known that Avery didn't care enough to do the same.

It made him wonder. How many other things could she have been lying to him about? Carson had never thought Avery to be capable of keeping a lie going for so long to anybody, much more himself. But people, they can surprise you.

Carson wanted nothing more than to forgive her, swing his arm over the shoulder of the now crying girl, like he normally did, and walk her to her class. But Avery had taught him, when it came to his failed relationships, not to allow people to just walk over his heart and let them back in.

"We're best friends. Practically siblings," he reiterated. "We tell each other everything and you lied to me."

The volume of Avery's sobs only increased and her legs felt weak.

"You didn't even trust me enough to forgive you. You thought I was going to leave you. I think that's the part that hurts most. The guilt you feel is nothing compared to the pain I do."

With that, he left Avery leaning against her locker for support. Her world felt like it was falling apart. The inquisitive students, who had gathered around the pair of best friends to listen in to the situation, were now gossiping amongst each other. They looked at her with faces of disappointment, malice, disgust and annoyance- not that she had expected anything different.

Gone was her previous wallflower status. She was now known as the girl who broke Carson Armani's heart.