Peter Parker One-Shots

Prank Wars

Ships :
Spideypool
Stony
Winterhawk
Peptasha
Lollipop x Wade
Teams :
Peptasha and Stony

Spideypool and Winter Hawk

Neutrals : (kind of)
Bruce
~~~

"PETER! I NEED HELP WITH SOMETHING!" Clint shouted, barging into said teenager's lab, who jumped. Wade looked up from where he was sucking on a lollipop, before going back to destroying the motherfucker.

Peter nodded " Uhm, is this about the Prank Wars that Dad started yesterday? " He asked, a bit worried for his Uncle's mental health.

Clint stared at him, as of saying " Child, are you dumb? " before nodding " You and Wade should team up with me and Buckster! Also, I need help creating glitter arrows that cover the person you shoot with glitter. " He chirped, happily.

The teenager glanced at Wade, who simply shrugged " Let's do it, Spidey, I'm bored anyway. " Peter rolled his eyes, but agreed, starting on a design for the arrows

~~~Meanwhile, In a certain bedroom~~~
Tony and Steve were doing some not very PG things in their room when someone knocked. Steve pulled away, going a bit red in fear that they saw. He decided it would be best to simply cover himself with the blankets, while Tony simply put his clothes back on, minus the shirt, and answered it " Hi, Nat. "

Natasha pushed past him, noticing Steve and sighing " First, use protection. Second, Clint and Bucky made an alliance with Wade and Peter for your stupid Prank wars, so we should make one too. " How she knew this, who knows? She's a lesbian goddess, so we will never know.

Steve raised an eyebrow " An alliance? So we wouldn't prank each other but prank everyone else? "

Natasha responded by giving him the same look Clint gave Peter, only more as a glare and scarier. Tony shrugged " Why not? Now leave us alone! " He whined, the red-haired spy muttering something that sounded like ' horny losers ' before leaving.

~~~Back to Peter's lab~~~
Peter was on his knees, doing some not very PG 13 things to Wade, who was sitting in the chair.

"Hey Pete, are my arrow- dEAR GOD! " Clint screamed, Peter bolting up, turning all kinds of shades of red " Uh, you should knock. "

Clint whispered something about his poor eyes, and glared at Wade " Lock the door next time, teenagers. Anyway, are my arrows done? "

Peter nodded, getting a quiver full of sparkly arrows, giving one to the archer. " Shoot Wade. "

Wade stared at his boyfriend " Bitch, the fuck? " He whined, and shrieked when Clint shot him. The arrow didn't hurt him, but exploded into glitter " OH GOD, I'M GOING TO DIE NOW! GOOD BYE CRUEL WORLD, MY MINECRAFT DOGS WERE THE ONLY TRUE FRIENDS I HAD! " He pretended to die, Peter simply face palming. " Oh, here, give this to Bucky, tell him to add it to the cookies. "

He handed Clint a bottle of extra spicy hot sauce, who grinned. " You Asshole genius. " The archer then ran off, to get his fiancé to spice things up ( you see what I did there- I- sorry- )

The next Monday, everybody had their pranks set up. Tony had made it so every time anyone on the opposing team tried turning the lights on or off, it did the opposite.

Steve, the innocent one, did something small like water-above-doors and leaving mean post it notes. Natasha got -read forced- Tony to create black widow robots. She couldn't get real ones mostly because of the venom, sadly. She hid them just about everywhere she could, keeping one as a pet.

Pepper decided to just stay out of it, instead wondering how the hell she ended up with adult children.

On the other side, things were much more...hectic. [is that right? I don't care tbh, I'm tired.]

Nobody trusted Bucky's food, because he put a lot of salt or hot sauce into it. Tony was the first to fall for it, gulping down a brownie and screeching at the heat. However, Bucky was really the only one who could cook, so basically everyone who wasn't on his side was fucked. Except Natasha, mostly because she's scary.

Clint kept running in at random times, shooting people with his glitter arrows and playing earrape in the middle of the night, also very sexual sounds.

Wade just put gum on everyone's shoes, and a very soft strawberry in their shoes so when they put them on, squish. He also kept moving Tony's toolbox solely to piss him off, and his Bruce's clothes, most of which formerly belonging to the scientist's husband, Thor.

Peter had gone for a much more easy way, well,easy for smart people like him. He created a machine that dispensed pies into the faces of anyone besides his teammates, however the cream had dark blue food dye in it, so just about everyone looked like a very weird smurf.
He had also set up ten Alexa's around the house, hidden, and got them to set off an alarm at random times.

Thor and Loki, the alliance less were doing just fine. Loki kept putting people's things in random places, and more then once drugged one of them and then left them on the roof.

Thor kept throwing pop tarts at everyone, screaming 'I don't get no sleep cause of y'all' at three am.

It was very strange, but was normal for the Avengers family.
Oh, they also locked Tony in a cupboard for thirty minutes.