CRIMSON STREAM [KYLO REN X READER] BOOK I

6

Waking up was difficult. You were extremely tired, but you wanted to get some training out of the way this morning. With all of the wedding preparation and the meetings and gatherings to discuss bringing your kingdom together with others, you hardly had time to practice.

Dismissing your handmaidens, you gathered your own clothes - a black tank top with a thick strap, leggings, and a thin skirt that was unevenly cut along the bottom, and you dressed yourself. Your hair was put in a simple ponytail. 

Leaving your bathroom after you washed up and changed, you were surprised to see Kylo already there. You jumped and sucked in a deep breath, whispering out, "What are you doing here?" Your guards were right outside your door, ready to retrieve you when you were ready to go. 

"I had to see you," he said. 

You crossed your arms over your chest and rolled forward slightly on the balls of your feet, peering cautiously at the door. "Why?" you said in a hushed voice. 

"Because-" He stopped, and the corner of his top lip twitched. "Because I just knew I had to."

As he smiled, even though it was barely a smile, you saw a glimpse of Ben Solo. 

Your heart skipped a beat and you couldn't help it - you flashed a pleased grin. 

"I have training today," you said. You moved so that you could stand next to him, leaned against your vanity, ankles and arms crossed. "You should join me."

"I probably would, but Hux has scheduled plenty for me to do on behalf of the Supreme Leader," he said. "Besides, I have plenty to do before the wedding."

"Oh, of course." You tore your eyes away from him and nodded. "Of course."

His eyebrows pulled together. "Do you wish to marry me?"

You thought hard about that question. A wrinkle of focus formed directly between your brows as you considered what you wanted and what was expected of you.

Finally, you had your answer.

"I... don't know," you admitted in a whisper. "Don't get me wrong, I enjoy your company, Commander. But..."

"What is it?" he pressed, voice low.

"Have you ever felt like... like you have no control of what you're allowed to want and what you aren't, so you just... detach?"

He did not answer. You glanced at him.

"Have you, Commander?"

He nodded slightly. "I have before, yes."

"How did you differentiate between the two?" you asked.

"Something inside of me... snapped one day," he said. His voice was so low. It was just below a whisper, but you heard every word inside your mind. "On two separate occasions."

"And now you know what you want?" you asked, amazed.

He nodded. "It'll come to you," he said. "Whatever it is."

"Tell me more about us," you whispered. 

There was a knock at the door. 

You gasped and turned your head towards it. Glancing back behind you, Kylo Ren was gone. You swallowed your disappointment and opened it, getting back to what you needed to be doing. 

 / / /

You lashed out, swinging your staff as hard as you could in your step uncle's direction. He blocked it easily, twisting your arm so that you turned around. You cried out and went right back to it.