Fickle Hedgehog Village

Valentine's Day Skirmish

Valentine's Day, Sonic and Amy are riding the float. Everything is peachy, except Amy is a bit uneasy.

"Relax, Amy," Sonic says. "I know this is surreal but we gotta give the people what they want."

"Haha, it's um, not that. Say, listen Sonic, would you be mad if me and the gang sort-ah kinda came up with a plan to make the village like Shadow by provoking Eggman to attack us today?"

"Wait what?!" Sonic exclaims right as Eggman's mechs drop into the scene.

Everyone screams and hides. Eggman flies to them on the Egg Mobile.

"Happy Valentine's Day, Sonic! My mechs are here to join the parade and of course, to obliterate you! I even upgraded Obliterator Bot with a pink and red paint job... and a new cannon. Obliterator Bot, atttaaaccck!"

Obliterator bot fires at the float. Sonic and Amy leap off as it explodes.

"Tell me, Amy Rose," Sonic begins, irritated, "why would this make everyone like Shadow now?"

"Oh that," Eggman replies. "It's really very simple. Ya see, Team Sonic agreed not to show up to the parade, leaving only you and Amy here alone to fight me. Guess you'll have to call Shadow for back up instead of them!"

Sonic puts his hands on his hips.

"That's ridiculous, I'll take you down myself!"

He flies in the air and starts spin attacking the mech. The other mech grabs Amy.

"Hey! We agreed you weren't gonna involve me!" she yells at Eggman.

Eggman grins.

"Well what do ya know, I changed my mind about our agreement. It's not like we had a contract, though if we did, it would be void... or would it be breached? Let me think about this, because if we never actually made the contract, that would make it nonexistent. So yeah, calling it void makes more sense."

"Amy!" Sonic cries and starts wailing on the second mech but Obliterator grabs him. "What the?!"

"Awe, what's the matter Sonic? Is your guard down because all your melodramatic, lovey-dovey stuff got in the way? This is what happens when you get distracted by your outcasted crush. Team Eggman finally wins! Valentine's Day truly is a glorious day!"

"Not so fast, Eggman," Rouge the Bat calls out from out of the blue.

Eggman looks up at Rouge as she hovers above his head.

"Hey, I know you. You're the one whose always trying to steal the energy crystals I use to power my external stereo system back at the lair."

"That's me, Rouge the Bat, and a friend to Team Sonic. YAH!"

She powerhouse kick's the arm of the mech holding Amy. The arm breaks and drops her.

"Grah, a little help here, ladies!" Sonic requests.

The girls go turbo on the mechs. Eggman is displeased.

"Hey, who ordered all this unwanted girl power? I didn't sign up for this!"

"Looks like we're the ones breaking the nonexistent contract, Egg Face!" Amy yells as she smashes away with her hammer.

A swarm of Badnicks show up... but so does Team Sonic.

"So much for our plan!" Knuckles shrugs and punches a crab bot.

"Let's take 'em down!" Sticks cries and throws her boomerang at a bee bot.

"We're with you, Sticks!" Tails yells and uses his zapper to break a scorpion bot.

Together, Knuckles and Rouge knock the arm off Obliterator Bot and free Sonic. Then Team Sonic plus one, victoriously defeats Eggman in a matter of seconds. The village cheers.

Eggman pouts.

"Wow, that really took the wind out of my sails."

Beth yells, "Best Valentine's Day ever!"

Wildcat hollers, "Hooray for Team Sonic!"

Lady Walrus declares, "Our heroes!"

The Chameleon blurts out at Rouge, "Nice boobies!"

"Excuse me?" Amy responds with disgust, "I would like to know who foolishly just said that last remark?"

The Chameleon pretends he's an actual tree. Amy stands next to Rouge and scolds him.

"As a strong female leader and influence in this town, I do not appreciate you speaking to this incredible fighter in such a sexist manner."

Perci reminds everyone, using air quotes for the phrase, chili dogs... "It's not as sexist as what we said about Sonic loving chili dogs."

"I do love chili dogs but yeah, that was pretty bad," Sonic replies.

Shadow Chaos Controls beside Rouge. "Impressive combat moves, neighbor."

"Thanks, homeboy," she beams as she and Shadow fist bump.

Rouge and Shadow then proceed to knock Eggman over the horizon.

"At least I ruined Valentine's Daaaaaayyy!" he hollers as he flings into the distance.

"Yay, Bestie, you came!" Sonic shouts joyfully as he darts to Shadow and embraces him in front of the villagers. "I know it's only been like, less than a day, but I heart you and I missed you!"

"I missed you too," Shadow tells him. With sincere vulnerability, he caresses Sonic and confesses to him, in the presence of everybody... "We've battled before, but all I ever wanted was to be your Shadow, behind you, to catch you if you fall."

Everyone reacts with a unified...

"Aaaawwwweee."

But the focus shifts fickly, when Dave the Intern announces...

"Try the new Sriracha Meh Burger featuring Dollar Tree brand Sriracha sauce and a side of scorched french fries!"

Soar the Eagle insists, "It's too good to be true!"

Lady Walrus compliments, "A meal worthy of the Gods to say the least!"

Old Monkey notes, "in the last few days, it's the most intriguing event where two opposing flavors have unexpectedly come together to illustrate a declaration of true love... in my taste buds!"

"Totally!" Knuckles agrees, "I gotta try one!"

Everyone hurries to Meh Burger, ecstatically, forgetting all about Sonic, Shadow, Valentine's Day, the welfare of their digestive systems... and all is well.

The End.  Next story in the series: Eggman VS Sonadow.