My oh secret diary

The day i alomost lost

October-1-1996

So it's been a few day since I wrote in here but this been going crazy for the past couple of weeks. M me and Brandon are still go strong I really think his the one for me I love him to death. He makes me so happy we been dating for about 3 mouths now and I still have butterflies when he kisses me. I love Brandon I really home I can stay with him forever because I really think he's my one and only.

October-2-1996

Okay so today in school everything felt wired and I don't know why. I walked in to school and Brandon didn't meet me at the door that was different then I walked in class and Brandon wasn't there I felt scared what happen to him I just saw him yesterday and he was fine. The worst part James wasn't here either I was getting really worried

October-3-14

Okay the thing with James I don't know what to do anymore I love him he's my best friend and I love him so much but Brandon thinks I still have feelings for James so I been pushing James away because I want to keep Brandon but I don't wanna lose James I really need to get my act together.

October-4-1996

I just found out why James and Brandon wasn't in class the other day there got suspended for getting in a fright with each other when they got back to school I tried to ask them what happen but both of them weren't talking to me and I didn't know what to do did James tell Brandon something or did Brandon tell James something I'm so confused I'm just gonna give up because there no point in trying to keep both of them anymore.

October-18-14

So yes I didn't skip and couple of days because there wasn't much to right about because Brandon and James are both still acting like I'm not even there. I been trying to think what I did to make them both hate me so much but I don't have a single clue so I walked up and tried to talk to Jessica today in class to see why Brandon and James where ignoring me and all she said maybe you should stop being a whore and you can get you guys back and then she walked away. I was just thinking to my self what does she mean by whore.

October-19-1996

I'm still thing about what Jessica mean about me being a whore I only slept with one guy and that was Brandon. I tried to text James and Brandon but all I got was I cant talk busy. Today at school I didn't go to any of my classes I just sat in the shed in the back of the school. As I was looking around I got a text it was from James I was so surprised to see a text from him. The text read " hey I really miss you and I wanna talk but Brandon has to be there when we do so me and Brandon will me you in the shed in 20 minutes" I was so scared what they were gonna talk about that I would barley both to hid my pack of cigarettes and my can of beer. I saw the, coming out of the school so I stood up and looked right at them both. James walk up to me and said hey and Brandon looked at me and said nothing. I sat down on the opposite side of the table and looked at them both. Brandon banned his hand on the table and screamed dammit Violet why do you have to be suck a whore. James said Brandon we don't know if that's even true so shut up and sit down. James start to ask me something when Brandon cut him off and ask " violet why did you have sex with someone else when you were dating me?" He looked like he was about to cry. I looked up and said what do you mean I only had sex with you and that's it. James said a little bird told us that someone told her you had sex with me Brandon and some guy name hunter. What I don't know anyone name hunter and I only had sex with Brandon I can prove it to ask my mom I been home the only time I leave the house it when Brandon comes to pick me up. I looked at Brandon and I say tears running down his face I looked at James and James knew me and Brandon need time alone so he studs up and said I'll talk to you guys later.

October-20-1996

So what happen after James left was I stood up and move to were I was siting right next to Brandon. I grab his hand and said Brandon I wouldn't do that to you your the love of my life I love you so much your the best thing that ever happen to me and I would never hurt you like that. Brandon start to say then why did Jessica tell us that why did she say that you did that. I don't know Brandon but I know that your the only guy I want to be with and the only guy I will ever be with and you should know that. I looked down at the ground and I start to cry the next thing I know is that Brandon put his hand on my chin and moved my head to look at him and he said violet you don't know how much you mean to me this relationship keeps me going in like you are my soul and I would be nothing with out you and he kissed me. I forgot how much I enjoyed kissing him it was like a new start for me . He moved away from me and I asked him what was wrong. If I tell you'll hate me forever. What do you mean? I said with a confused face I know how much you hate Jessica and all and how you hate her because James and her but I did something bad and if I tell you. You will never forgive me "what do you do ?" Brandon looked up at me and took my hand and said well Jessica told me about the sex thing I asked her to come over I looked up think ping I already know what he's gonna say well violet Jessica and I had sex but it didn't mean anything I promise. I stood up and said I just need to think about this for a few day I gotta go so grabbed my bag and I ran away not looking back.

October-21-1996

Brandon has been trying to text me all night but I can't answer him I'm just not ready to talk to him yet. I text James to come to my house I need a hug he said he will be there soon. A knocked came to my door it was James he gave me a huge hug and we walked to my room. As James being my best friend we got in bed and we layed down and started to talk to each other it got to 1 in the morning when I told jame i think it's time for him to go home. He said I'm not going home till I know that you'll okay. Thx James I love you. Anytime I. Just a phone call away. He put his arm around me and pulled my close to him and he would let me go and as a few minutes passed but and we both were sound asleep