It's Always Been You

In The Quiet Hours

It was safe to say that over the last few weeks, Wes and I had become more than just acquaintances-we had forged a bond of friendship that ran deeper than mere camaraderie. I would even go so far as to consider him one of my closest friends.

Nate and I, however, were still stuck in the same limbo, trapped in a cycle of push and pull that threatened to tear us apart at the seams.

Some days, he would be his old self-the charming, attentive boyfriend who would greet me with a tender kiss and spend lazy hours by my side, our bodies entwined as we studied together or simply basked in each other's company.

Most days, though, he was distant and cold, his demeanour tinged with a cruel indifference that cut deeper than any blade.

Every time I would attempt to broach the subject of our unravelling relationship, to lay bare the wounds that had been festering beneath the surface, he would dismiss me with a wave of his hand or snap at me with biting words, his irritation a palpable force that seemed to suck the very air from the room.

I let out a guttural groan of pure frustration, the primal sound ripping from my throat as I slammed my textbook shut with a resounding thud.

In a fit of pique, I shoved the offending tome across the floor, watching with a sense of grim satisfaction as it skidded away from me.

"Woah there," Chris's voice rang out, thick with undisguised surprise as he stared at me with wide eyes. "I don't think I've ever seen you just...bail on studying like that before, Fia. You feeling okay?"

I shot him a withering look, feeling the weight of countless sleepless nights and endless hours spent poring over dusty academic texts settle heavily on my shoulders. "It's been hours, Chris," I bit out, unable to keep the weariness from seeping into my tone. "My brain legitimately cannot handle any more information being crammed into it tonight."

"Which is exactly why I gave up on the studying thing hours ago," Michelle chimed in with a lilting laugh. She was sprawled across her bed in a languid tangle of limbs, idly scrolling through her phone with deft swipes of her thumb.

Chris nodded slowly, seeming to consider my words as he mirrored my earlier actions-slamming his own textbook shut with a definitive thud. "You're probably right," he agreed, his shoulders slumping slightly as the weight of our collective academic burdens seemed to lift, if only momentarily. "We've still got plenty of time before exams to get through the rest of this material. No need to fry our brains into mush just yet."

Exhaling a shuddering breath, I leaned back against the side of my bed and allowed my body to unfurl-revelling in the simple pleasure of being able to stretch out my limbs after hours of being coiled like a tightly wound spring.

"You know, I never thought I'd actually say this..." I began, trailing off as I gazed at my friends with a rueful smile. "But I'm kind of looking forward to this winter break."

Michelle looked up sharply at that, her perfectly arched brows shooting upward in an expression of utter incredulity. "Wait, really?" she countered, her tone laced with surprise. "But I thought you were absolutely dreading having to go back home for the holidays this year?"

"Oh, I absolutely am," I confirmed with a weary sigh, unable to mask the dread that seemed to settle over me like a suffocating blanket at the mere thought of my family. "Believe me, having to deal with my parents and their ridiculous expectations is the last thing I want right now."

Running a hand through my hair, I shook my head slowly as I struggled to find the right words to articulate the tangled web of emotions swirling within me.

"But at the same time-I'm just really glad we're getting a break from classes and all this insanity for a little while, you know?" I continued at last, unable to keep the exhaustion from bleeding into my tone. "Because you were all right-freshman year really has been a special kind of hell so far."