Initiate // Sterek

// sixteen //

Everyone was on constant alert. The council could arrive at any moment and we couldn't count on them coming peacefully.
Despite our night together, Derek and I weren't really talking that much. We talked when we needed to, but neither of us were going out of our way to make conversation.
It was stupid, and kind of sad, really. I supposed at first that he was angry at me too, but it seems more like he's giving me space. Which makes me feel like crap because I haven't gotten the balls to go back to him yet.

I was washing the dishes in the kitchen when Malia came in and took a seat at the table. She had a book in her hand and she began to read it silently. "Can I help you?" I asked in surprise of her sudden arrival.

"You had sex, didn't you?" She replied. "Um, I, um," I stuttered, not expecting that from her at all.
She smiled broadly. "I knew it!" She shouted, laughing. She suddenly stopped. "Was it.. He didn't hurt you did he?" She asked, a sudden change of tone in her voice.

"What? No!" I reassured her. "It was fine." I told her truthflly. "It was amazing, actually." I said, blushing.

"Then what did he do to make you guys act like neither one of you exist?" She asked. I put the bowl I was currently cleaning back into the sink. "Shit, is it really that noticeable?" I replied, sighing.

"Are you blind? Derek's been a total dickwad to us and you don't say a single word. It's hard to not notice." She proclaimed.
Honestly, I hadn't noticed Derek being a dick, probably because I was too busy trying to not notice him.

"Oh." Was all I could say. She put her book down and walked over to me. "Yeah 'oh'." She said before slapping me in the back of the head. Instinctively I put my hand up to where she had hit to soothe the pain that wasn't even there. "Hey, what was that for!?" I asked defensively.

"What happened between you two? " She replied, her voice had a sad tone to it. I looked down at my feet. I wasn't sure if I wanted to tell her everything Derek told me. Sure, I trusted her, but Derek was her cousin. Could it affect them? I mulled it over in my head for a few minutes before deciding it couldn't be that bad to tell her.

"Okay, but I don't know where to start, so this might be a little messed up." I said sheepishly. She nodded and waited for me to start speaking again.

"Okay, so you know when we all first got here they told us that we were 'chosen' because we had some supernatural ability inside of us?" She nodded warily. "I wasn't. Derek brought me here himself." I told her. I let out a breath that I didn't realise I was holding in. She didn't say anything, she just made a gesture to tell me to keep going.

"When Derek first met me, I had just been spying on him and Peter. They killed Lydia's boyfriend and I was scared shitless because I knew what they were. Derek ran after me, and consequently ended up saving me from being attacked by Peter." I said. I heard her mutter a faint "Why of all people did he have to be my dad?" under her breath. I couldn't blame her. Peter was an ass. "And then, apparently after that Derek and I started hanging out with each other. And my memories are still all fuzzy now, so the only part of that stage of knowing him I remember is him smashing my head against the dashboard of my jeep." I said, a faint smile on my face.

"All of a sudden we were together, like, together together. And that's the part I want to remember most, because of the things that happened next. According to Derek, someone sent us a threat saying that we needed to end things or the council would be alerted." I told her, trying to stick as much to the point as I could. She was paying full attention to everything I was saying. "He didn't tell me in full detail, I'm sure, but he said I was attacked after we didn't end what we had. He got scared and took me away from my house, and remembered that the initiate programme was starting up soon and that he would have to work for it. So he brought me to a hotel, cleaned me up, and gave me the memory serum that put me under. He told me I was under it for about a week before they brought me here." Derek had given some more detail than that, but it didn't really matter that much.

"And you didn't tear his face up on the spot?" She asked, I could practically feel the anger bubbling inside of her. "Believe me, I wanted to. But I couldn't." I told her truthfully. "Why? I know he's my cousin but that was a really dick move considering where it's gotten you." She said, going to clean the dirt from under her fingernails.

"Because there was more than that. He cried, Malia, Derek Hale cried. He said he was doing what he thought was best for me, and I believe that, I do. He apologised for everything he had done. He said he wished we had never met so I wouldn't have had to go through all of this. And I know my head is fucked up, but I know that was fucked up. I ran out as you probably know seeing as Scott and Isaac found me. Then I ran into him on the way to the dorms and we shouted. I know the shouting barely lasted minutes but it feels like it went on for hours. He was mad at me, which just made me more mad at him. And then we did it. I don't even know how it got to that considering all of the fighting but we ended up doing it, both of us so mad at each other. And I told him I loved him and he said it to me too, and I told myself I forgave him, but I don't know if I do. And now we barely talk and he's gone back to being what you guys call 'the old Derek ' and I'm at the point that I don't even know what exactly I'm mad at him for." I fessed, barely pausing for breaths.

"None of that made any sense, I'm sorry, my head's just been a constant mess for the last month." I told her, sliding my body on to the kitchen floor, washing the dishes had long since been forgotten.
"Get up." Malia said as I rolled my head in my hands. I looked at her questioningly. " I said get up. I don't do this often so make the best of it." She said. I stood up and looked her in the eyes.

She leaned in and pressed her mouth against mine. I was in shock, I had no idea what she was doing. I kissed back for a split second before Derek's came to my mind, and I pulled away. She looked at me, a sad smile on her face. "Malia, why did you do that?" I asked softly. I wasn't sure whether to be angry with her considering all I had just told her.

"Did that feel wrong?" She asked. I nodded. "Did you think of Derek when I kissed you?" She asked again. I nodded. "See, I didn't know if that would work, but I was doing what I thought was best for you. See where I'm going with this?" She asked smiling.
I paused for a moment. "God dammit Malia." I said as a tear came to my eye. I wiped it away hastily.

She pulled me in again, but this time for a hug. I buried my face into her neck. "Thank you." I whispered.
~
I had spent the rest of the day with Malia, trying to think of a way of approaching Derek. We didn't know whether to make a big deal about it or make it an intimate thing. We had went to the library and lit the fire as we thought of plans. It vaguely reminded me of one of those teenage girl slumber parties where the friends gush about their crushes to each other. We were sipping on the hot chocolate I had made for us when Boyd opened the door.

"They're here."