born of blue blood

chapter 7

It was a few hours later and I was with Loki and Thor on the way to a lesson with Frigga. I still wasn't sure about how this meeting would go, and I was a little apprehensive. It would be my first time with both of the princes in a learning environment. I didn't exactly count the training room as learning as there wasn't any instructing going on. It was more of an excuse to fight people.

We entered the room and I saw that it was empty. Thor turned to me and asked

" So what are you going to have as your mini elective? Loki is doing magic but he does that all the time and I can't see how it helps, so I'm doing this tree language because treeEsS! " Loki seemed to be resisting the urge to facepalm. That smile of Thor's was driving me crazy. It had no intelligence just raw enthusiasm. The worlds would be doomed if he ever became King.

"Thor there aren't any Flora on Asgard or any of the nine realms and there haven't been for millennia. The language is dead. There aren't even any manuscripts in it that you can read. Also we don't even start our electives for another decade. " Loki's tone summed up my feelings exactly.

I had heard of the Flora, they were a species of trees that had once roamed Yggdrasil before vanishing. It was believed that they had been hunted down by mercenaries for unknown reasons. 

Frigga entered the room looking less regal than she usually did and three tables appeared each with a book open on top.

"Today we will be continuing where we left off. Thor, I understand that you are on levitation still but Loki, you are well on your way to mastering shifting. " I could hardly believe that Thor had not yet mastered the basics. But then again I was surprised that he could make friends and talk in semi - complete sentences.

The lesson passed quite uneventfully. Thor failed, Loki progressed, and Frigga assessed me as I performed each spell in the book one at a time. Then it was over.

As I turned to leave I heard the queen begin to speak.

" Rak I would like to talk with you. You boys can leave " The princes left and I turned the Frigga.

"I'm going to be frank with  you. Who are you. How did you come to Asgard and why. Heimdall does not see you and he did not let you in. You are young and yet you are learned and mature."

She was so annoying. I was Rak, a rogue from Jotunheim and I came here to be free. I wanted to escape from my past because it had become too much effort to kill everyone in sight without raising suspicion. I had been raised in a war like environment so yes I was skilled because I needed to be to survive.

I decided to ask a question or two of my own.

" You act as if Loki is your son when you know that he is not, and everyone else ignores him. No one has mentioned your daughter and I have not seen anything of hers. Surely the first born would have a room in the palace? And why is Thor so... bad at everything. Why is he so obnoxious, that is not how a prince should act. "

The queen seemed to shrink in front of me as she sighed before answering.

" I act as if Loki is my son as he is. I love him equally to Thor but as Loki is less of a warrior the people do not feel the same way. Thor acts the way he does as that is how he is expected to act. In love with training and not much else. "The stronger the warrior the better the king" is an old saying that too many people believe. And as for Hela, according to Odin she never existed.

But what about you. You haven't answered anything I asked you. You pretend to be cold and your face shows no emotion, but your eyes contain feeling. "

There is no point in hiding my logic, I suppose. Maybe if she understood she wouldn't bother me so much.

" Other people show emotions and they get exploited for it. They suffer for it. If you don't care you don't get hurt. That's how it is. "

" You sound like a child. Not understanding that we can't just give up on emotions. Relationships are what makes us strong. You can stay sad and unfeeling as you are. Afraid to get hurt. But you will never be happy if that's the case. People get hurt. Because they feel. They find happiness because they got hurt along the way. If you never come out of your shell and live a little you won't understand what it truly means to be happy. "

And then I realised that tactics are circumstantial. In this world hiding made me seem afraid, not strong. I needed to adapt to civilian life. No one from my past could come here, so I was free to experience calm. To not have to fight. 

From now on I would pretend to feel. I would create a persona that seemed to open up to people. 

( the power to loooooove one aanoootheeeerr is the greeeeaatesst poooweeeeeer of aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaall

yeah I got this stuck in my head while writing this and now you must share my pain

if you dont know what this is from go watch twisted)