Friends, Lovers, or Nothing

Chapter Twenty-Three - Carry Me Away

It's Saturday morning when Jaxon knocks on my bedroom door and asks me to accompany him to breakfast at Thorntons. I don't think twice before throwing on a pair of distressed jeans and a crewneck sweater and follow him out the front door.

Jaxon and I had fallen into such a normal routine these last few weeks, it almost seemed like we were actually dating. But I didn't dare bring that up to him. I liked spending time with him more than anyone else I had met here these past two months, but I didn't want to spoil it by trying to give whatever we were a label. If Jaxon didn't mind about keeping our relationship open-ended, why should I?

But whatever was going on between us was surprisingly nice, like a constant in my life that I had grown to count on every day. Like on Monday's when we would watch The Bachelor together, or the other occasional nights when Jaxon would plan something fun outside the house for us to do. Even the nights that Jaxon would spend with me in my bed, promising to hold me until I fell asleep was something that I now looked forward to.

I had fallen hard for Jaxon and there was no getting around it anymore. And I had accepted that.

I was so totally screwed. I accepted that too.

I couldn't help but get lost in thought as we sat there inside the restaurant, my mind running wild with all of the chaotic thoughts I had surrounding Jaxon. I didn't think that it would ever come down to this, as I'd been so persistent about how much I didn't need a boyfriend right now. I'm sure Layla and Makenzie would get a kick out of this one, huh?

In the end, my fears outweighed my desire to have Jaxon all to myself and I would have to live with that harrowing truth... but only for now.

I'm gently taken out of my daze when Jaxon clears his throat and nods at the untouched plate of food that was placed in front of me minutes ago.

"What'd that french toast ever do to you?" He asks before stuffing another bite of his blueberry pancakes into his mouth. I roll my eyes at him and promptly pick up my fork.

"Sorry, I was just thinking," I tell him, causing him to raise a brow at me.

"About?" He prods.

I sigh, not wanting to admit that my thoughts had anything and everything to do with him. His head was already big enough as it was.

"Just work and school and everything else there is to possibly be stressed about. I can't believe it's almost November," I remark, to which he gives an understanding nod.

"I know what you mean, the semester is kinda flying by," he makes a small face that almost looks like disappointment before turning back to his pancakes. Interesting.

Jaxon and I continue eating our respective dishes in a comfortable silence until Jaxon's phone starts ringing from the inside of his front pocket. He gives me an apologetic smile before sliding the phone out of his jeans to check the caller ID.

He audibly groans as he turns the cellphone to face me long enough for me to read the word, 'Mom' sprawled across the top of his phone.

"It'll just be a second," he says, surprising me as he tucks the phone against his left ear and answers the call.

"Hey, Mom," he says into his cellphone, a bright smile now painted on his face.

I find myself glancing away from him as something heavy prods at my chest hearing Jaxon converse with his mother. To most, it was just a normal, everyday interaction but to me it is something that I will never get to experience. I realize that it's jealousy I feel flooding into my body and the thought alone makes me feel icky.

I didn't know too much about Jaxon's home life, but the way in which he talks about his mother always feels so sincere. He clearly loves her. And for that reason, I was jealous. Mostly because I can't for the life of me remember what that even feels like. To be loved so fiercely by another, even by a parent was a blessing.

"Yeah, I'm just out to breakfast with my roommate," he says to his mom. I tune into Jaxon's conversation at the mention of myself. The phone was glued tight to Jaxon's ear but I swear I hear his mother say my name in her response. Jaxon notes my confused look and moves to cover the mouthpiece.

"She says hi," he mouths to me, quickly returning back to his conversation. The thought that Jaxon had brought me up enough times to his mother that she could recall my name so easily unexpectedly shoots shocks of pleasure up and through my body.

I'm smiling to myself when Jaxon hangs up the phone with his Mom, but I quickly snap out of it as he looks over at me.

"So uh," he says, followed by a small, almost forced laughter, "Question?"

I raise a brow at him in response, "What?" I ask, confused by the change in his exterior. He almost seemed nervous all of the sudden.

"I really don't know how to say this to you without sounding like a crazy person, so..." he trails off.

A beat passes of him saying nothing so I widen my eyes at him and laugh, "Well, just spit it out already, Jax."

"Iwantyoutocomehomewithmeforthanksgiving."

Did he just say-

"What did you say?" I ask him, making sure I heard him correctly.

Jaxon scratches the back on his neck before responding, "I just," he takes a deep breath, "We have the whole week off and it is coming up kinda soon, I mean I was thinking about it and I don't want you to be here alone all week."

My heart starts to beat erratically out of my chest as I search for the correct words to say in response, "Jaxon, I couldn't impose like that, I-"

"No! No, it wouldn't be imposing! I already asked my Mom and-"

"You asked your Mom?" I cut him off.

"Yeah, well, she basically invited you after I told her you wouldn't be going back to New York and would be alone here all week." I turn away from him, not sure what to say. I was shocked to say the least.

He reaches for one of my hands across the table which I reluctantly give to him, "Please, Blakey, I really want you to come. My Mom always makes way too much food anyway and my sister isn't coming home till Christmas this year so it'll just be my parents and my younger brother. It'll be super low pressure, I swear." He tells me.

My cheeks flush red at his confession, and my eyes fill with unsolicited tears. Great, now I was crying. And he thought he was the crazy person.

"Blake," Jaxon says, most likely stunned at my adverse reaction to his invitation, "Blake, it's okay, you don't have to come if you don't want to."

I shake my head back and forth at his words and stand up to walk to his side of the table. Jaxon jumps to his feet just in time for me to launch myself full force into his arms, him immediately sweeping me up into a weirdly intimate hug.

I pull away from him enough to look him in the eyes, "I haven't had a proper Thanksgiving in over ten years," I tell him, lightly sniffing. He reaches to brush some of my fallen hair behind my ear before using his thumb to brush away a single tear that had fallen from my eye.

"I'm sorry, I'm such a mess," I tell him, laughing through my own tears, "God, I probably look crazy."

"You look anything but, Blake. I promise," He tells me, his arms still wrapped tightly around my body, "So, does that mean you want to come? We'll have a guest room you can stay in and I can show you around all the places where I grew up, we could even-"

I cut off Jaxon's ramble by pressing my lips firmly against his, to which he quickly takes the lead, pressing his hands onto the sides of my head to deepen the kiss for a moment. I pull away and look him in his eyes, mine still shinning in unshed tears, "I would love to come."

~

WoAh, hey guys! It's been a hot second, I hope you guys will forgive me for slacking so hard on this story. The updates may not be as frequent now that I'm back in school but I can promise you i will NEVER give up on this book completely and i will be finishing it someday. Hope you guys liked the chapter, if you're confused please go back and reread a few chapters to refresh your memory! love you all <3