Angel of forgiveness [DISCONTINUED]

Chapter 3: Then I'll go

When Izzy came to her office she let out a deep breath. It was hard not to cry. It was hard to look fine in front of the other Shadowhunters. Even when she was with Jace she couldn't let herself cry. Not when she knew that it was a hundred times harder for Jace. She remembered the morning after Magnus and Alec's wedding. Jace didn't want to ruin their wedding so til next morning he hasn't told anyone about the situation with Clary. She remembered looking for him and finding him in Clary's room, sitting on her bed crying. Then he told her everything. First few days he was sad. He lost her. Again. And this time he couldn't do anything to get her back.  Then he was angry- angry on himself for leaving Clary's side, angry on Johnathan; if it wasn't for him Clary didn't have to leave, angry on angels. Then the anger faded away and he became a worse version of the Jace she knew before Clary. He was alive, but it felt like his soul was ripped out of his body. Izzy felt a tear fall on her hand. She hasn't even noticed she was crying. She wiped out the tears from her eyes and reached out for her stele placed on the table. She quickly wrote about the current Clary situation and sent the fire message. Just as the letter disappeared Simon came to the room. He got used to not having to knock on the door; after all, it was his girlfriend's office. "Hey." he murmured and kissed her. "Hi." Izzy tried to wipe out sadness from her voice but she didn't quite succeed. Simon noticed it as well so his face has gone from happy to suspicious. "What happened? Were you crying?" "Oh, it's..... today it's one year since....." "Since the night, " Simon said with a hurt voice." Since the night Clary left." "Look Simon there is something I have to tell you. God, I'd love to keep it away from you, but you have the same right to know it just as everyone around." "Wait, Jace found someone else?" He was joking. Izzy felt a sudden wash of relief. Maybe Simon will take it all better than she thought. Or maybe he will not. "No, and that's the point." "Okay, Izzy with this kind of seriousness you're making me really worried. If it's something horrible just spit it out. It'll be over sooner and it'll hurt less." "I...I don't think the pain will be over sooner. It's... God, I didn't think it'll be that kind of hard." Simon stood up and took a step in her direction. He gently took her hands in his and said: "Whatever it is we'll get through it together." "It's Clary. Simon's face darkened. "Is she-" "Jace, he...he was checking on her, " Izzy continued."And she saw him. Then she remembered his name, and...and her runes they came back but it was way too much on her body so she fainted. We don't know if her memories came back as well. She is still unconscious. Jace is looking over her." Izzy let out in one breath. Simon's face was cracked with sadness. He missed his best friend so much. He took a quick step to the door but Izzy caught his wrist. He looked back on her question in his eyes."Don't. It may be too hard for her to wake up and find a best friend she thought was dead standing by her. We don't know if her memories will ever come back. And if they didn't that would be the hardest thing for her to deal with." Izzy had a point, Simon thought. He was too shocked and sad to let out any word. He just nodded. Izzy pulled him back to her and kissed him softly on his lips. "In the meantime, please don't come here. It's for your own good because I know that if you were here you would be only sad and eventually you would go to check on her. If she wakes up, I'll tell you." Simon nodded and kissed her. After a moment he pulled away and stepped in the direction of the door. "Then I'll go." he said over his shoulder as the door clicked closed behind him.