prompts 11 and 24 - josh 11 - "Please, just let me go." 24 - "Stop dammit! I'm trying to be mad at you!"
Thanks to samsfilthyfeet for the requesttttt For what you are about to read, I apologize in advance. :')
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^^this gif makes me highly uncomfortable^^ a n y w a y . . .
You were curled up on a vintage velvet sofa, drinking some kind of herbal tea and reading. Well, you pretended to read. You're eyes ran over words, but you weren't reading. You were thinking. Specifically about last weekend. You and Josh had a massive argument about him still hanging out with his ex-girlfriend. It wasn't his fault, she just showed up at a party the boys were having. But still, he was acting a little more friendly with her than what was good for him. In fact, if you didn't know any better, you might even say flirting. He would whisper to her, and she would giggle. Josh would rest his hand on her somewhere, and would hold onto his forearm. You couldn't help but notice how much of a better couple they made. You and Josh weren't very similar. But her and Josh looked like they were meant to be.
Josh was a flirt, and you knew that it would be hard for him to break that habit. You'd seen him charm teenage fangirls until they nearly cried, you'd seen him compliment a interviewer's looks or tastes. That was easy to shrug off, because it was nothing. There was no history or no actual sincerity behind it. There was a history here. Her and Josh had been off and on for nearly 4 years, which made you think: "Maybe they're just off right now, and I'm only a time filler..."
Josh noticed you were acting off, so he confronted you about it when you got home. "I swear, nothing's wrong!" You shouted at him after he continued to badger you about it. "See! That right there, something's wrong. You never yell." He replied, annoyed that you weren't telling him what was bothering you. "Okay. You want to know? You really wanna know?" You hissed at him, throwing down your purse onto your bed a bit harder than you meant. "That would be fanfuckingtastic." He hissed back. "Florence." You replied, storming off into your bathroom. Josh followed closely. "Okay, what about her? Are you jealous or something?" You sighed loudly and harshly brought your fist onto the counter. "No, I am not jealous, Joshua. I am, however, annoyed that you would act like that toward her." "What, being amicable toward my friend?" He asked. "Don't give me that bullshit. You know very well that whatever you were doing was not in anyway done platonically." He ran his hand through his brown curly hair, sighing in frustration. "All we did was talk!" He yelled, turning away before facing you again. "Okay, Josh." Was your sarcastic reply. "I think I'm gonna go out for a little bit. Don't wait up." "Where the hell do you think you're gonna go?" He asked harshly, and you couldn't help but notice a little concern in his tone, making his voice waver. "Far away from this." You hissed.
You grabbed your keys, a small bag of clothes, and left the apartment, before sitting in your car and crying softly for what seemed like ages. It was happening again. The things you loved most always left you. You thought this was different, maybe fate would let you at least have Josh. You were wrong. You heard a tap on the window. You looked for the noise through tear-stained eyes. It was Josh. You rolled it down a little. "What?" You asked, wiping your nose with the back of your hand and trying to sound like you hadn't just been sobbing your eyes out. "Don't." He said, breathlessly. Your eyes met his, and you noticed a little redness in them, like he had been crying. "Please, just let me go. I don't want to be here anymore." You rolled the window up and pulled out.
A few days later, you came back. You stayed with your best friend, Elisa, and she made you promise you'd go back and fix things with your boyfriend. You hated it though. Everytime he would get a text or a call, you wondered if it was from her. Everytime he smiled to himself about something, or softly laughed, you wondered if he was thinking about her.
You were on the velvet couch, now watching Josh writing at his desk. You used to love watching him work on songs or poems, but now, it felt different. "What?" He asked in frustration. "Huh?" You replied, snapping back into reality. "You were staring at me." "No, I wasn't. I was thinking." You took a sip out of your mug. "Oh." He said, standing up to come closer to you. "About what?" "For your information, about you." You snapped. "Or, more correctly, about how if it wasn't for Elisa, I wouldn't be here with you right now." He huffed and opened the fridge, pulling out a beer. "Well, I'm not exactly ecstatic about you being here, either." He mumbled, making his way back into his small office. You grimaced at him for a while. Did he even see why you were upset? You knew he cared. He cared more than anyone. All you wanted was an affirmation that he did. You guys had barely even touched since that night, but you just wanted him.
You wanted him to see why you were upset. You wanted him to hug you and tell you everything was okay. You hated being this way. You and Josh were both so stubborn, and you knew that he would just keep getting more and more difficult. You knew you overreacted a little. He was probably just making small talk with her.
After much internal fighting, you decided to apologize. You didn't care about pride anymore, you needed Josh. You made your way toward his workspace, leaning on the open doorframe. He threw his pen down before crossing his arms and looking at you. "What? What is it now?" He sighed. You smiled and made your way over to him, propping yourself up on his side of the desk, looking down at him. "What the hell are you doing now?" He hissed. You shrugged at him. "Watching." "Okay, well I'm actually very busy, so if you wouldn't mind." He motioned toward the door. "No." You smiled at him, playing with one of his curls. He tried to hide his smile and shoved your hand away from his head, looking down at one of the many papers that covered his desk. You brought your hand back up to his head, dragging your finger down to his neck, sloping down to his shoulder, and then running it down his arm. "Stop!" He yelled, trying to stifle a laugh. You laughed back, cupping his face in your hands, planting a kiss on his forehead. "I'm really sorry for making this into some big deal, Joshie." You whispered, getting lost in his deep brown eyes, realizing for the first time how tear-stained they were.
"Stop dammit! I'm trying to be mad at you!" He laughed loudly, kissing you and pulling you into him, still on his chair. He tangled his fingers in your hair, and you clasped your hands behind his neck, kissing him like you needed it in order to live. He pulled away and smiled, tucking a stray hair behind your ear. "Well, that was shitty. Let's never do it again." He chuckled, referring once again to your argument. "Yeah." You responded, curled up in his lap as he kissed your forehead.
