Under The Weather

13

"I told him he'd have to wait until I finished checking up on you and your family had left." She straightened herself, "All done. Guess you'll want to see Lance, so I'll leave."

No, I didn't want to see Lance, quite frankly, I knew what he'd say.

"Hey, Bailey." Lance sat in the chair next to the bed, "Can we talk?"

"A-Abbie told you."

He sighed, "Why Bailey? I just don't get it."

"I-I don't k-know." I responded with a blank expression, "M-Maybe I'm j-just t-that bad."

Lance scoffed at me, "What you did is seriously messed up."

"How can you sit here and pity yourself, knowing a person killed themselves because you made their life a living hell?!" He raised his voice, making me flinch, "I thought you were different, but you're just like everyone else." 

He shook his head, "You couldn't even tell me? You let me tell you about what happened to my brother and you sat there in silence?"

I didn't open my mouth.

He was right, after all. I was feeling sorry for myself; Jamie was the one who died, and I could've done something to stop it.

"Bailey?" she stared at me as the others left laughing.

"Jamie," I helped her up, "I'm so sorry."

"Why didn't you say anything?"

I sighed, "Rachel would be on my case if I did. You know what she's like."

"Oh okay..." her voice trailed off as she turned and left.

Even then all I did was think about myself and what others thought about me.

"You know what, I can't be here with you right now." Lance stormed away.

My biggest fear had come to life, Lance had left me.

Now I knew how Jamie felt when I pushed her around, I was supposed to be her friend.

***

"Bailey!" Jamie stood in front of me on the roof, "I thought we were friends."

I ran towards her, "Jamie?"

She fell backwards, "No!"

"Jamie!"

I jolted awake, rubbing my face.

"Nice to see you're finally awake." Nurse Brynn and Doctor Addison stood either side of my bed.

"Are you okay?" Nurse Brynn reached out to me, "You look scared."

I flopped back, "I-I'm f-fine."

"You should leave your room today." She added.

Doctor Addison nodded, "Your treatment starts officially tomorrow. It would be nice to leave your room once more before then, right?"

I murmured in agreement; I still had a small headache from it all. 

I had almost completely forgotten why I was here.

"Wait for a second, Bailey can you tell me something about that picture?" She pointed to the photo on my desk.

I paused analysing it, "I d-don't r-remember i-it all t-that w-well."

"Really? It was only a few months ago." Nurse Brynn glanced at Doctor Addison.

"What can you remember well?"

"A l-lot." I furrowed my eyebrows together.

They both squinted at me, "Are you sure? No problems with your memory?"

"Y-yes, I'm s-sure..." I was lifted in my wheelchair as they left the room.

Pushing myself out of the room, I sighed following the path to the cafeteria.

I entered the room and picked up some food, lots of it to be exact, just then I noticed Luna, Abbie and Lance sitting together.

They looked to my direction, before shaking their heads and turning back.

My body slumped, dragging me to the table in the corner.

Right now, it felt like the world was against me.

"Do you ever feel like the world hates you?" Jamie was walking with me back home.

"No?"

She sighed, "Well, it's probably the second-worst feeling ever, besides being lonely."

"Well, you have me. I could never hate you, Jamie."