A Collection of the Broken

-What Do I See?-

What do I see?

I wake up to the sound of bells.

It is distant, and shallow, but I can pick up its faint ring. Alone, I can tell the sound is too small to have awoken me. Especially from my peaceful slumber. Yet here I am, awake, lying in bed, listening to the rings of maybe hundreds of bells.

Darkness is all around, and it terrifies me. I have always been afraid of the dark. The very idea of it frightens me.

Darkness:

The absence of light.

Since I was a child I have imagined a countless number of beasts and hideous monsters to inhabit the plain of the unknown darkness. I cannot, without having chills shiver down my spine, think of being left alone in a wretched place such as this- a place of darkness. If I were to be, I would be subject to the many terrible tortures the monsters have in store for me. 

That is why I sleep with my bright lamp to keep me company- a lamp that has always kept the darkness away from me. But, for some reason, my light has been turned off, and I am stranded in the deep and infinite realm of the darkness.

I do not move a single muscle, my body is frozen to the spot and I am staring at the unmoving ceiling (because the rest of the world seems to be spinning), and I wait for sleep to take control over me.  

Nothing happens, and after twenty minutes or so, I succumb to the idea that I will not rest on this now sleepless night. At that moment, the darkness seems to deepen, and open, revealing a whole new world- a whole new level- of the unknown.

My eyes widen and I think to myself, "I must leave this horrible place."

But I cannot summon the courage to step off the bed. Now, imagine that which I was experiencing , what if you were to be trapped on your own mattress? What if you could see nothing but darkness and only hear the sound of faint bells? That is what I feel- the darkness that swirls around me and   my own lungs beginning to fail me.

It is becoming increasingly difficult to breathe. Soon, I sense the emptiness filling my entire body. I can not stop it- neither could I slow it- the terrible descent into death. The darkness then closed in on me, and after I could not even see my chest rise up and down as it struggled to find air.

"Will I die here?"

But no! After many long minutes of fighting for air, I relax, and slowly, the darkness draws back, and leaves me- for a few short moments- while I gather my senses. At one second, I had to remember I was on my own bed, which, for sure, was not my death bed.

And then the sounds of the bells exploded.

Instantly the almost quiet night is replaced by the deafening sound of millions of bells ringing, and in no particular order did they ring. NOT AT ALL! they randomly, violently jingle, forcing me to finally move by covering my ears with the cup of my hands.

I run out of bed, and in a hurry, for no reason whatsoever, find myself heading straight toward the sound. I could not feel any force pulling me, neither did I feel something calling me, nor did I want to be going to it.

I just found myself going toward it.

And soon the straight hallways of my once comfortable home became jagged twists and turns heading to a sound becoming steadily more and more deafening.

And why did I not stop? 

Truthfully, I do not know, and I don't expect I ever will.

And then as I realize there is no turning back, that there is no escape- I find an end.

And there are the bells.

Rows and rows full of millions and millions of bells line up against a wall of fine white. Light comes from above, giving this single place the gift of sight. Then I walk down the middle of this whitened room.

There is a door, a huge door made of wooden oak, one with smooth, golden handles. I feel as if I should be attracted to this door, that I should be dying to open it to see what is on the other side.

But I do not feel a thing. I am not dying to open it! I am not drawn to this door- neither am I feeling I should be at the very spot!

Still, without those feelings, I am interested in what I might find behind this door. So I rest my hand on the handle, and I push the heavy door.

It is locked.

"Why am I here?"

The deafening sounds of the bells go silent. The white room blackens, and the door fades away. In one blink, nothing is left.  

But then a woman appears! She is dressed in a long gown of white and she is decorated with beautiful jewelry pieces of diamond.

He finger is raised to her lips and she says no words, as if to say, "Keep Quiet."

I run to her, hoping she will help me I anyway possible, because I am now left in the darkness, and I now there are no more places where light shines. I am stranded in darkness, a sitting duck for monsters that are waiting. 

I never reach her.  

She fades away as well and I am left alone in the darkness, but I feel something heavy form in my pocket. I pull it out when I am sure it is there.

It is a bell.

A small bell- and in my hand, it seems heavy enough to hold down the world.

-Then the sound of a giant's stomp pound against the dark floor. Paralyzed, I am forced to wait for the monsters.

And then I see it.

Monster in the night

Leave me be

Stay away

As in my hand

I hold a bell

Of golden reflection and a loving ring

So must you come closer?

In the light surrounded by darkness

In a world where dreams seem alive

So keep away!

- leave me be!

I beg you please!

And if you do

In return,

I shall let you hear the sound of my golden bell