Shin's Diary

Chapter 10: Disappointment

It was almost 8 o’clock in the evening when Ian took her to her house. The evening breeze unbelievably touched their skins. Shin stared at Ian momentously, and they both exchanged heavy glances and smiles. Shin was deeply rejoicing for being with Ian the whole day for he made it more relaxed and refreshed. Ian had introduced her into a totally new dimension she had never explored before. Ian was the opposite of what she thinks. She thought flirts a lot using his magnetic looks and that Ian is vain and conceited… all of those perceptions were wrong. Ian was just natural with an unobvious religious view of life which disappoints her that she is not.

They stood before the gate and still, they have glued their eyes upon each other.

“Thank you, I enjoyed a lot,” Shin started, still looking at Ian’s fascinating eyes.

“Yeah… uhm, you can come back there anytime. So, see you around tomorrow,” he said.

Unknowingly, Gab was standing a few meters away from them, looking haggard with his hair untidy and his polo shirt open. His long bangs were covering with blazing eyes. Gab sped off to Ian and took a grip of Ian’s tux tightly and punched Ian.

Ian was outbalanced by Gab’s forceful punch, he stumbled off the ground. There was blood at the corner of Ian’s lips and he abruptly wiped it off. Shin’s eyes widened in fear and tried to help Ian for him to stand.

“Don’t touch him!” Gab demanded and she appallingly followed his words.

Ian stood off from the ground with a fierce look at Gab and headed back to the car. He immediately started the car and sped off.

“What were you doing?” Shin impulsively shouted.

“What were you doing?!” Gab repeated back her question fiercely. “You have a boyfriend Shin, yet you are flirting with that man… and what’s worse, he is your BOSS, which in conclusion makes it very difficult for you to leave his company because you are flirting with him! And not because you want to own that stupid spot!”

“Gab, I don’t understand you. Ian and I were just talking. He took me to his church, okay? What’s the problem with that?” she provoked him. “And you know what, I never flirt with him. Whatever affair I have with him is purely business. And I’m tired. Let’s not talk about this, alright?”

“Just purely business, eh?” a boss can’t be that nice to his employees, damnit!”

Shin was about to shout again when she thought of leaving him alone instead. Her eyes streamed with tears but she kept holding on those tears so that they won’t fall. She left him without a word of saying goodbye.

Dear Diary,
The day starts with me being disappointed and so is this night. I headed to check him in to his hotel but he wasn’t there. In my great(?) dismay, an informant told me that he went back to Manila to do something which I obviously had no idea about. Maybe, I was really desperate-looking at the park, Ian noticed me. Ian swept my mind off to the disappointment that I felt.
Ian took me to his church. And he introduced me to his ex-girlfriend who was beyond perfect. I don’t know where she got that beauty though --- maybe to Aphrodite? All of his churchmates were nice and friendly, all of them bring their sweetest smiles on. Ian was a devotee of God. Amazingly, he stood in front of the people as the speaker. He said next year he’ll be a pastor and maybe, he will leave the company for good. He is so determine about his pastorship.
I joined lunch with him and his family. Yeah, sounds crazy but they were so welcoming and nice, with not an air of being negative. I also never thought that joining in their religious lifestyle is enjoying. Yeah--- there are so many things I have learned. The topic was about love. And the message was more than wonderful. I felt clarified about the love God wants to give and the ideal of finding a perfect partner for life.
Ian shared something in the church. He said he found his forever love but for now, they’re not meant to be. God will find a way, he said.
Then, he fetched me home. Everything turns out to be okay until Gab came and beat him. Ian never fought back. Gab was outraged for seeing that I was with Ian… which is too illogical to me. I never thought Gab can say those filthy words at me. We’re just being together for just a week and he’s starting to show his true colors. Maybe he wasn’t that nice after all or maybe it was really my fault.
And that disappoints me again. See? What a great day!
XOXO,
Shin Go

There was faint knock on the door. She was expecting Gab to come over and say sorry for what he had done a while ago. But as she opened the door, she was flabbergasted that it was Ian standing in front of the door, and was horrified. She was anxious about what had happened to him, of course.

“You need to get out of here,” said Ian surprisingly.

“H-Huh? Why?” she inquired, a little bit curious.

“JUST GET OUT OF THAT DAMN HOUSE AND COME WITH ME!” he shouted. He knew he was harsh but it’s only for her. He doesn’t care if she’ll get mad if he’ll drag her to the car but he’s worrying for her safety. Instead of taking hotness on his head, he stared at her sincerely. She was furious. No one in this world had ever shouted to her that loud. Ian took a grip of her hands and let her feel his warmth.

“What not is your problem?” she asked angrily.

She tried to remain calm and still, trying hard not to be blown by his anger… or worry rather.

“Okay,” he said and huff a sigh and unleashed his madness. “This is a serious problem. I should be telling this to you when you get in the car, I promise. Shin, I just don’t want anything will happen to you.”

She doubted his words but there was no point of lying to her. He looked anxious as though he’s holding her life with his bare hands. She can see his sweat falling off the ground. She wasn’t troubled about her life, she was concern about Ian.

“Shin, please trust me,” Ian begged to her. “Even just for once.”

She took a deep breath and decided for herself. If she is going with him for her own safety, then she must go with him but then, if he’ll take risk just to save her, then she won’t.

“No, I should not,” she finally decided. “If it will take you so much risk, then I have to say no, okay? This is my own problem; you are not included in it.”

“I am, Shin. Come with me,” he pleaded more.

“A-Are you sure of what you’re doing?” she asked, trying to see his real concern to her.

“Yes, I won’t put some efforts if I’m not.”

Then, he held her hand really tight but there was no touch of harshness. His touches were gentle as if she was so fragile that he doesn’t want to break her.

“Okay,” she said. “But let me call Carmen first.”

“Call her in the car,” he said.

He’s truly a convincing actor. He easily hypnotized his prey. Corny as it sounds, his charms had worked for her. Before they headed to the car, he went closer to her and kissed her forehead, then down to her rosy cheeks and finally to her delectable lips. He was a man of ardor. His kisses were expecting for her response.

She felt strangely hot that she couldn’t resist the temptation that he has been giving her. Her body was like involuntary when her hands reach for him to cling to him. It’s her first kiss --- a kiss of unexpected passion.

The kiss was carnal and penetrating like she doesn’t want to let him go yet. She couldn’t breathe but somehow, she wants to savor every taste of his kiss. Life like heaven.

He stopped and caught a breath. Then, he smirked at her. “I love your lips,” he commented in a tone of seriousness. “But Shin, we have to go.”