Comfort Zone

Chapter 51

"Haven't you had enough of death, for goodness sakes?" Belle said when Miriam told her about the funeral she'd be attending the following morning.

"Never enough. It just keeps coming at us, nothing to be done."

"Well, keep ducking then."

"I promise I'll try."

Miriam had promised Marie Toussaint that she'd go to her funeral when her patient signed up with hospice six months before. By her sixtieth birthday, the woman had collected a list of problems that took two printed sheets to contain, and the fact that she made it another ten years was considered a miracle by her family, who never stopped pointing it out to Miriam.

But finally, Marie had felt poorly enough to admit privately to Miriam that she was tired of fighting.

"I'm ready, Doctor Miriam," she'd said. "I just want to be kept comfortable until I meet my Maker." Ms. Toussaint was the only patient who called her Doctor Miriam, though several called her just plain Miriam.

That same day, she'd exacted the promise that her doctor would attend her funeral.

Miriam finished her afternoon patients, and even got through her "to do" stack, saving worst for last: Lindner's envelope. But it wasn't a disability form or anything like it, it was even more ridiculous.

A ticket to Paris for the fall? What a crazy gesture. He really thought...?

It was much too expensive a present from a patient to even think about accepting. Even a former patient.

There was a short letter attached.

"I know you think I'm a nut job, but I wanted to buy you this ticket. I have to go there on business and I just thought...I don't know what I thought, I just wanted to do it to make up for some of the annoyance I caused you. I already booked two rooms—in two separate hotels. The ticket's nonrefundable. Go and take the vacation you deserve. Please.

Gary"

He'd included his card. A law school classmate of my ex, how charming, she thought, but she couldn't resist going to his website, thinking he was probably a malpractice lawyer on the wrong side, or an ambulance chaser. Instead, the site said he was part of an international team combatting human trafficking. So he's a regular Prince Charming and rescues small kittens from burning buildings, too, she thought, just let him do his good work away from me. The thought of the stressful, phony visits still made her burn, and it was unlikely she could manage to get beyond them.

There was a large turnout for Marie Toussaint. Her open casket was in front of the room, and she was dressed in one of the bright red dresses she'd favored. The cloying smell of bouquets filled the air until Miriam felt dizzy. There were hundreds of mourners, and the ones who knew Miriam kept introducing her to the others until she felt like a celebrity.

The minister began speaking words of comfort and belief, and talked about the dearly departed whom he had known for years. She was in a better place, she was at peace, she was getting her final reward, they should all be full of joy that she was home at last. God called her home. Let's give thanks! he exclaimed.

Cliches, Miriam thought. Platitudes. That's all anyone says at times like this. She barely resisted a smirk, forced her face neutral. Why had she agreed to come?

Life is short, but Ms. Toussaint made her time shine! The love of her family sustained her all these years, and the care of her doctor, who is sitting here with us today.

Everyone turned to Miriam and her face burned. Oh come on.

A good doctor, the minister went on, she was blessed to have a doctor who sustained her all these years, who did everything in her power to keep her here with us but now, finally, she's passed into a better place, and is with us no longer...