This is a story of: a perfect life, amazing career, love, tragedy, pain and healing.
Heavily inspired by Korn's new album, The Nothing
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* DISCLAIMER:
I do not own any members of Slipknot or Stone Sour.
I do not own any lyrics used unless o...
* DISCLAIMER: Contains explicit language, violent references, sexual content.
Three Days Later
"Wake up, gorgeous! It's the start of a brand new day. It's going to be different from now on!" Ruby screamed as she jumped onto my bed, waking me from my medicated sleep.
"Rubes, what the hell are you talking about?" I asked her as I tried to open my eyes that were crusted shut. Not that I would have been able to see through the hair matted in my face, anyway.
"Today begins your healing. I've let you handle things your way but I'm not seeing anything improve. So beginning now, you play by my rules." The covers were then tugged off of me, leaving my body exposed and cold from the sudden change.
No matter how much I protested, Ruby won after she pulled me out of bed and threw clothes at my face, pushing me into my bathroom to shower. I sighed and decided to try her little test. In the end, I would still have the same problems and feel the same way. But if it helped the only person left in this world that loves me, then so be it.
I turned on the hot water all the way and let it warm as I undressed from my pajamas. I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and cringed. Ruby is right. Something has to change. I just look like a shell of the woman I once was.
Stepping into the shower, I felt my muscles instantly relax a little from the warmth consuming me.
'Today begins your healing,' Ruby's words echoed through my head and for whatever reason, I felt like I actually wanted to try.
I bathed, shaved, washed my hair, and relaxed under the warm water for quite some time. When I finally shut off the water and reached for my towel, realization set in that this is the first morning I haven't cried in the shower. Maybe this can work out. Who knows?
I went to put on the clothes that Ruby had thrown me which consisted of black jeans, a dark red v-neck sweater, and my old leather jacket. I felt the sadness creep up as I thought of John. This was his favorite jacket of mine. It still smelt of the home I'd shared with him and I felt the tears threatening to spill.
No matter how hard I fought back, they still came. A sob forced its way from my throat, and I let my pain come back to the surface. I clutched onto the counter to keep my body from crumbling to the floor.
"You okay, babe?" Ruby asked as she entered the door, hugging me to her chest. I wrapped my arms around her and took a deep breath.
"The jacket got me," I admitted to her.
"Fuck! I'm so sorry. I should have thought about it-,"
I interrupted, letting her know everything I had reminds me of him and it is no way her fault.
"Let's go get something to eat and maybe head into the city? Des Moines is beautiful and has a lot of shops we can check out," Ruby suggested. I knew she had something else under her sleeve but I still agreed, not wanting to hang around the house all day again.
"Put some makeup on and I'll meet you downstairs," Ruby smoothed my hair out and left the bathroom, shutting the door behind her.
Makeup? I haven't bothered with it since the funeral. All I do is cry and it gets ruined anyway.
Keeping it simple, I added some grey eyeshadow with eyeliner and chapstick. That's better than nothing and if Ruby wants more, she'll have to do it herself.
"John always loved taking pictures from the bridge. You can see the entire skyline and at sunset, it's absolutely stunning," I smiled as I thought about how we always had to come to this spot when we passed through.
"See! That, right there! You just spoke of John and you smiled, you didn't cry. I'm so proud of you, babes!" Ruby squeaked out as she squeezed my knee, making me jump.
"Hey! Paws off!" I laughed and she instantly laughed with me, then we couldn't stop for the life of us. "My ribs! I'm gonna have abs!" I clutched my sides as we continued to laugh.
A few moments later, we pulled into the parking lot of a large mall. I raised an eyebrow at her; she said food first. "Don't you miss mall food?" Ruby asked, seeming to read my mind as we exited her car. I rolled my eyes and we walked in together. I haven't been eating much lately anyway, plus I'm not a picky eater so Ruby always chooses where we go.
I see you; but I can't feel you anymore / I need you; but I can't need you anymore...
- x -
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