Pedestal

Chapter 29

29 - Lying Game

Anya's POV

I stared at her for a moment before letting out a nervous laugh, "What?"

Nola didn't look away from me, and her expression didn't soften. "You heard me, Anya. I asked if you're in love with me."

My heart started beating faster and my stomach twisted as I began to feel sick.

I knew exactly what was about to happen.

"Uh." I spoke lowly, "Why you asking me that?"

"Remember what I said when we first met? That we'd never get together, and you shouldn't catch feelings?" She asked.

I felt myself getting sicker as I nodded at her.

Nola let out a sigh as she looked down at her lap.

"To be honest, I like where we're at right now. I want things to stay like this. But if you love me, you're wasting your time. It'd be best that we end things here and you find someone else." Nola said, not bothering to spare me a glance once.

I bit my tongue hard to keep myself from tearing up, as I stared down at my thighs.

"So, let's clarify this right now, Anya." I heard Nola say, and it got a little hard to breathe.

If I say the truth, I won't ever see her again...

I took a deep breath and it came out as a sigh.

"I'm not in love with you, Nola. I ain't stupid enough to let myself fall for you. I knew what it was from the start." I said, and I forced a laugh.

It felt like I had just sliced my heart open.

I looked up at her. "I like where we at, too."

Nola stared at me for a moment before letting out a breath that she held, "Alright."

--

I laid my head on the table in our break-room, releasing a sigh.

I was hoping the coolness would cool my head down, it felt like it was going to explode with all this overthinking I've been doing.

The shuffling of bags invaded my state of peace as someone else sat down at the table.

I let out another sigh and they asked, "What's with you and all this sighing?"

I really don't want to be bothered.

I looked up with a dull look and realized it was Jess as I smiled slightly.

"Aye... what you doing here? You had day shift. This night shift." I said and I sat up straight.

"Yeah, I know." She said, letting out a sigh.

"But I missed my favorite stud so I had to come see you! I haven't seen you in a minute! I bought chicken nuggets!" Jess smiled big.

I looked at table and she had bought us each 20-piece chicken nuggets from McDonald's.

I smiled at the gesture and thanked her, "Thanks, Jess... I really appreciate this."

She sat down with me as she opened up her box. "Sarah's bitchass been putting us on different schedules on purpose. I can't stand her."

I chuckled slightly and broke a nugget into pieces. Jess gasped suddenly and I looked up.

"What?" I asked.

She just stared at me before shouting, "What's wrong!? You got indigestion? Your stomach hurt!? Why you not inhaling your nuggets already?"

"I'm not really hungry..." I shrugged.

Jess furrowed her brows at me. "Nah, something's not right. You ain't even notice me come in. I'm worried about you, ma. Tell me what's wrong."

I took a deep breath before I gave in.

I told her everything that's been happening, excluding any sexual details.

"What the fuck! Who does she think she is?! Even after you stayed and took care of her, she said that to you?! I'll dead deck her in her shit, right now! Gimme her address!" Jess snapped.

"And why the fuck would you lie like that!?"

"What else was I supposed to do?" I asked.

Jess crossed her arms in disappointment. "You seriously still like this girl after all that?"

"I honestly do." I respond and Jess sighed.

"She a fuckin' asshole, man. But I understand the heart wants what it wants..." She grumbled, "You just gotta make her fall for you at this point."

"It's impossible." I said, "I'on think you understand how difficult shorty is..."

"Judging by what you've told me, I do." Jess said, "But I think it's a front, f'real."

I shook my head. "I ain't mention it before, but she was crying in her sleep last night... and she kept calling this girl's name."

"When I finally got her to relax, I went to get something to wipe her face with and found this crumbled up picture on her table of her and some girl, it had to be the same one."

"Nola got someone she cares about already, it's not gonna be me. I'm just someone she fucks."

Jess didn't say anything after that for a while.

Then she looked up at me with bright eyes. "I got it! You wrong! If she wanted that kid, I'm sure she'd be with 'em right now. And she's told you she hates being in a relationship, so..."

"You said she was crying in her sleep, so it's probably someone from her past. Someone she doesn't wanna meet again. They probably hurt her."

"People who say they hate love are usually the ones who've been hurt by it."

I rest my chin on my arms as I thought about it. That makes sense more. The picture was crumbled.

"You wanna be with her, right?" Jess asked.

"Yeah, but–" I tried but Jess cut me off, "Nah. No buts. You obviously ain't gone give up on your feelings for her. If she shows no signs of reciprocating those feelings in a month, cut her off."

"Your happiness is what matters the most."

I took a deep breath and nodded, "You right, Jess."

I need to know how she feels, and who that girl is to her. I can't give up before I get answers...

To be continued...
Published - 10/18/19