Heart of Moss

Chapter 8

Lewis
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For the first time in years, I woke up without a dream. The night fell silently, invisible to the eye. I remember the moonlight shining upon our bodies, as I grabbed her by the hair, pulling her closer to me. The woman was sleeping next to me, soundly. Her dark hair was a tangled mess, her bruised body was exposed to the world, the window and the curtains being wide open. Her pouty lips were in a smile. There were so many hickeys on her neck, arms, legs, and back. It was as if I had tried to eat her. I woke up underneath the blanket, my body naked. My back ached and I felt every scratch her fingertips made upon me the night before.

I watched her, Jennifer, sleeping. I then looked up, sighing. I've done it. My heart suddenly ached out of anxiety and panic. I've cheated on Bia. On our very bed. And what's worse, she had just gotten into an accident.

I turn to the bedside drawer, the lamp was still on from last night. Jennifer's phone beside it. I picked it up, checking out a few of her notifications. There were messages from her email. From the hospital. Bia was awake last night, as I caressed and lustfully taken control of my best friend.

I check the time, it was already noon. I drop the phone back to the drawer. She must be awake right now, waiting for my visit. I stand, putting on whatever was in my closet and threw my clothes from last night to the laundry basket in my room. I turn to see Jennifer, still sleeping peacefully on the bed. I frown, before walking downstairs and outside the apartment, grabbing my own set of keys.

Now that I was out, I didn't know what to feel. Jennifer was alone in the apartment after our night. Bia was in the hospital, healing after her crash. Everything felt numb. It was colder today than usual, I've noticed. So cold.

I've gotten to the hospital, not realizing I had walked all the way here. There, I asked the boy behind the register about Bia's whereabouts. He willingly pointed me in the direction and told me the details. I went on an elevator, getting to her floor. I was in the hallway, and there I am, standing in front of her room.

I hesitated. My back still hurts. I stared at the blurry window for a while, before letting myself go in.

There was Bia, reading a book as she ate the awful hospital food. Her ears perked up at the sound of the door, her eyes then meeting mine. She smiled, gasping in pleasure. She dropped her book on her thighs as she lay on the bed. She outstretched her arms at the sight of me. I smiled back, and slowly, I reached out for her. I hugged her, falling carefully to her arms. Everything was silent for a moment. I spoke, "I'm sorry."

She let go, pushing me farther to see my face. "For what?" she asked. "You have done nothing wrong." I stared at her eyes, observing them for a moment. She had the same laugh in them. I chuckle.

I reached out for her fragile hand, giving it a small peck. "I've missed you."

She smiled, "I missed you too."

Memories from last night flooded me. Bia had no idea. "Lewis?"

"Yea?"

"What's that?"

I freeze, seeing her eyes glued to my neck. There was a bite. Jennifer's bite. I haven't seen it earlier. I look at it, looking back at her. I couldn't lie. I couldn't lie to her face.

"...Jennifer. It's her bite."

She went pale, her hands that were touching it out of pure worry stopped. She pulled back her hand. She couldn't look at me. Her eyes stayed on the bite. "You...You two...How could you?"

I looked down in my shame. But somehow, I felt no regrets with lusting over Jennifer's hourglass body. The sounds that escaped her lips as I pulled her hair, the way she bounced when I held her. 

"Grief," I said. It was the only excuse I could come up with. I looked up at Bia. Her posture was stiff, her eyes were drowsy, her lips quivered. I couldn't tell whether she believed me or not. Her eyes drooped down at her book, which she willingly held. I watched her fingertips open the book as she continued on reading, implying that she didn't want to talk anymore. I grab her free hand, caressing it using mine, playing with her knuckles. They were soft. So small, fragile and soft. I could watch and play with them all day.

I raised my eyes and watched her orbs roam around her book.

I recognized the book. It was the first of her published stories. I chuckle, trying to grab her attention, "How's Rica and her friends?"

She spoke, bluntly, "The sales are still ongoing." She then lowered her book and let me see her face, "'Falling Down' is such a success."

"Yeah, it is. I thought you hated that one?"

"Well, it is my first story. And, I get to see how much I've grown."

I chuckle, "You're amazing."

I look over to her cheeks, red at my comment. But she wasn't smiling. I guess I can understand why. I rose to my feet, catching her shocked expression. I lowered my head in front of her head, seeing her now dull ocean eyes right on my emerald ones. I reach out to grab her curly locks, trying to smooth them out. She accidentally dropped her burgundy red book, as her lips parted in surprise.

"I'm sorry for everything, Bia."

She was silent. I waited for her response. She opened her lips as if to say something but then didn't. I decided to continue speaking, "I'm sorry for leaving you alone. I'm sorry for dropping my phone. I'm sorry for letting you grab it. I'm sorry for cheating on you. I'm sorry for-" 

Her hand was on my cheek, fragile and soft. Without knowing, I had my eyes closed, tears dripping down. I opened them, seeing her ocean eyes filled to the brim with tears. She smiled, painfully, "It's okay. It's okay. I know."

More tears dripped down my face, the sudden numbness escaping my body as I grabbed her hand on my face, and tightened my grip on it as I rest my face on it, "I'm so sorry."

She chuckled weakly. I could tell she had no idea what to say after, but her eyes stayed on mine. She was beautiful, even in pain. But...something's wrong. Her eyes roamed around her peripheral view. When she noticed my stare, she immediately rested on mine. She smiled, "Lay your head on me, Lewis."

I came closer to her, following her orders. I lay my head on her chest, feeling and hearing her heartbeat from beneath her rib cage. It was slow.

There was a knock on the door. I stood up, calmly and smiled at her. She smiled back at me before answering the door with her voice, "Come in!"

The door opened, and I saw my best friend.

Jennifer entered the room, closing the door behind her. Her brown eyes were puffy and red, her dark hair was still in the same tangled mess as earlier. She wore a long black jumpsuit. It was the first time she wore anything that covered her body from the cold atmosphere since moving into the country.

"Bianca," she sobbed.