"Are you warm enough?" Chris' soft voice is prominent through the quiet car. The low purr of the engine is the only sound that resonates as we zip down the highway in his smooth BMW. He stretches out his arm to turn the heat down.
"I'm fine," I snap, crossing my arms in front of my chest. I stare out of the tinted window, wishing I were like the trees that passed by: always growing, never getting their leaves rustled by anything but nature.
I'm still hurt by his rejection, but the true punch to the gut was from myself. Why would I try to kiss him? What was I thinking? Sure Jer and I have problems, but what couple doesn't after having a child?
I feel selfish and disgusting. I deserve the horrible thoughts I'm thinking to myself that threaten to emotionally tear me apart.
Chris glances at me from the driver's side. I halfway expect him to chuckle, but he doesn't, as I'm sure he understands the seriousness of my imminent self-destructive behavior.
"If it makes you feel any better—"
"It doesn't." The words sound sharp coming from the darkness, and not another thing is said the entire way home.
***
I toss and turn in my sleep, my dreams infused with hazel eyes. When I wake up saturated in sweat, panting as if I've run a marathon, I glance at the clock: 4:15.
Audrey is still asleep, I can tell from her baby monitor on my night stand, so I decide to take a hot shower. Slowly getting up from the bed, so as to not wake a sleeping Jeremiah, I grab my robe and head to the master bath.
Our home is by no means a mansion, but we've done pretty well for ourselves. The master bath has a subway tile backsplash and a rainfall shower head. The vanities sport a quartz countertop that closely resembles an expensive marble, and Jeremiah DIYed the herringbone tiled floors.
The shower is hot and soothing. My hands lather the soap underneath the spewing water, and my thoughts drift to the print room conversation I had with Chris.
See? Afraid.
Those lips. His lips. His full, pink mouth is clear as day in my mind as my hands massage the shampoo into my hair.
I assume you're an employee as well?
His hazel eyes dancing in the sunlight when we first met just a few short days ago...
I'm nothing like your last boss...
I can still feel his lingering touch from that very first day in the break room.
My mind drifts to thoughts of Christopher. I imagine his hands on my body, his full lips trailing kisses down my neck, my shoulders, my arms. He whispers sweet nothings into my ear as he continues to run his fingers down my body...
What am I doing? I have a husband, I'm a mother! I can't be thinking of these things! I'm acting like a selfish, lustful adolescent!
I shut the water off, grab a towel from the cabinet and almost slip on the wet floor in my attempt at charging out of the bathroom. I catch my balance by grabbing hold of the door frame, but my elbow smacks against the shelf on the wall and all of my beauty products topple down onto the floor with a loud crash.
"Everything okay in there baby?" Jer's voice comes from the dark room. I can see his silhouette in the night, his tall frame sitting up in the bed.
"Yep! Fine!" I respond a little too cheerfully, holding back the whimper that tries to force its way up my throat.
Jeremiah lies back down, and I rush into our large walk-in closet and close the door behind me, finally letting all of the tears I've been holding back stream down my face.
I don't know how long I spend in the closet crying, but when I open the door Jeremiah is there, a white knight in a Rolling Stones t-shirt and plaid boxer shorts, holding a cup of scalding hot coffee for me. He doesn't ask why I was crying, he doesn't even speak, he just looks at me with piercing blue eyes.
I smile at Jer, letting him know that I appreciate his gesture, and retrieve the mug from his outstretched hand.
Our fingers brush against one another as I do so, but the surge of electricity that I'm expecting to feel, doesn't come.
————————————————————
Slowly, we're starting to see the actual relationship that Vanessa and Jeremiah share. Do you think it's as amazing as it looks from the outside? 🧐 Let me know in the comments!
Don't forget to VOTE ⭐️ and leave your feedback! Good, bad...it's ALL welcome 😇
YOU ARE READING
For A Reason
ChickLit"I just thought..." I begin, flustered, not really sure where my words are headed. He shakes his head. "We can't," he states, removing my hand from his. "There are a million reasons why we can't." He runs a hand through his hair, seemingly frustrate...
