Finding Me

11

July 1st-Adam

"Holy shit..." Adam says pulling into the driveway of the Pacific Palisades Home. 

"This place is huge..." Brooke gawks

"I mean our house is big but this is massive." Adam sighs parking the Range Rover. 

"Well, this is it." Brooke sighs getting out of the car and walking up the cobblestone path to the house. 

The two of them knock on the door and rapid yaps fill their ears. Stevie opens it smiling wide, her hair straight down her back wearing pink, and black what looks to be silk button-up, over a white tank top and jeans...of all things jeans. 

"Hey." She smiles wrapping them each in a hug. 

"I can't believe that you actually live here." Adam states. 

"I don't. I live in a condo mostly, but when I'm entertaining guests I stay here." Stevie explains inviting them in. 

"This is so pretty." Brooke coos. 

"I'm glad you like it. Come on in, I made some zucchini stir fry for lunch and do you have any requests for dinner. If I don't have it, I can send Karen out to get it." Stevie rambles. Adam smiles because it reminds him so much of his sister. 

"Mexican?" Adam asks rubbing the back of his neck. 

Stevie just stops and stares. "Mexican...you like Mexican?"

"I love Mexican. Charlotte hated Mexican so when we were with her we never got it but Bryan...That man can make a mean taco." Adam says. 

"Both he and Felicity are obsessed with Mexican. She was staying with us over one Christmas because her apartment complex was being fumigated. She ended up with the stomach flu and it knocked her on her ass for 72 days. I remember she started throwing up on Friday and didn't eat anything but saltines and sprite, then the next day she ate saltines and sprite but I made tacos for dinner because I was pregnant with Macey and I was craving them. She at three and was perfectly fine. The next day she tried to eat lasagna and she threw up again. I personally have never seen anything like it." Brooke explains. 

"I do it too..." Stevie looks down at her nails.

"Do what?" Adam questions. 

"When I'm sick the only thing I can tolerate is Mexican food. When I was pregnant I had the worst morning sickness and Lindsey would try to get me to eat different things but my babies were not letting me keep anything but Mexican food down. It's also funny because when my mother was pregnant with me, she craved Mexican. When I was pregnant I craved Mexican." Stevie smiles. 

"So Mexican for dinner?" Adam salivates. 

"Sure I'll make Mexican for dinner. How does Fiesta dip and Chicken enchiladas with black beans and Spanish rice sound?" Stevie questions grabbing a pad of paper from the table in the entryway. 

"Sounds divine." Adam grins slipping his black Chelsea boots off his feet. 

"Adam..." Brooke warns. 

"No, please do take your shoes off. I hate when people wear shoes in my house." Stevie looks up from scribbling. 

"Adam set that rule for our house too. But my feet always get cold." Brooke shrugs sliding her feet out of the sandals she was wearing. 

"You hold your pencil like Felicity does." Adam points. 

"Do I. I've never seen anybody else hold a pencil like this." She looks down at her hand. He can see a hint of a smile playing over her lips. 

***

After Karen is sent to the store and they scarf down the whole electric skillet full of zucchini stirfry, they were sitting in the living room watching Million Dollar Listing. 

"So how is tomorrow going to go?" Adam asks sipping on his bottle of water. 

"Well. I don't get up super early but I feel like I want to. The more time I get to spend with Felicity the better. So I was thinking we could get up around eight and I can make a great Omelet for you guys for breakfast and then we could go. I...I have Lindsey's address...I don't think I should be the first one at the door though because he kind of hates me right now. I mean, I did get him fired." Stevie looks down running her finger along the rim of her iced tea glass. 

"I think it sounds good." Adam shrugs. 

"I don't care what we do," Brooke says rolling in the middle of the floor with Lily. 

"Brooke, do you want a dog?" Adam asks out of the blue. 

"Maybe...I want one with hair though." She scrunches up her nose. 

"Hey...Lily is the cutest little baby ever." Stevie says in her baby voice.  

***

Adam and Brooke had finished unpacking when they came downstairs and Stevie was puttering around the kitchen. 

"Is there something we can help you with?" Brooke questions. 

"No. I'm making dinner. I don't need any help just make yourself at home." Stevie shakes her head pushing them out of the kitchen. 

"Mom, we want to help." Adam sighs. 

"I don't need help...Please, Adam, let me do this. I know you want to help but I never got to experience making dinner for my family." Stevie sighs tears welling up in her eyes. 

Adam nods before wrapping his arms around her. 

Brooke and Adam watch her cautiously. Both a little weary about the 71-year-old woman working around the kitchen but they let her do it with smiles on their faces. 

Stevie

Stevie sets the table and then she tells them that dinner is ready. Everyone fills their plates and cups and she does too, but she waits. She waits for them to take their first bites and she silently prays that they like the meal. She shouldn't have to prove herself to them but she really wants too. She wants to be apart of their lives, but she also knows that she's living in fantasy right now. They're going to go back to San Francisco, and they have a life there. Adam has a family that actually raised him and she knows that she's going to take second fiddle. She just wants to be apart of everything. 

Adam takes the first bite and just by the look on his face and the smile that graces his face when he bites into the enchilada she knows he likes it. 

"Mom this is amazing." Adam grins grabbing a tortilla chip and scooping up some of the dip. 

"I am so glad you like it." She lets out a breath she didn't know she was holding and finally, she starts eating her food. 

***

That night, she knew she had to go to bed by at least ten but she couldn't get herself to do it. She found herself staring at a small book she has tucked away for no one, not even Karen to see. It's a small book. It only has a few pictures in it. 

The first one isn't even a picture it's where two of the four positive pregnancy tests she took are sitting. The second picture is of the ultrasound where they found out she was pregnant with twins, then the other one where they found out the genders. After the ultrasounds are actual pictures she and Lindsey took. One where she was wearing absolutely nothing, except some shawls hiding her breasts and her privates. She was about six months pregnant and the smile on her face was precious. There are several other ones similar to that and then it eventually goes to when she gave birth. A picture of the twins laying together in the hospital cot, pictures of her and Lindsey holding them and a picture of Stevie feeding them their bottles. She ran her finger along the close-up picture she has of Felicity as a baby. Tomorrow she was hopefully going to meet her daughter.

***

Miraculously they all got up around eight and they made their way to Lindsey's Brentwood home. Stevie took a deep breath and the three of them walked up the front steps. 

Adam knocked and they waited.