Finding Me

12

July 1-Lindsey

Lindsey and Felicity were lounging by the now fully saltwater pool when Lindsey turned to her. 

"Do you think that you'll ever contact your mother. I mean you've been here now for about two months and she's only about fifteen minutes away." Lindsey says sipping on his water. 

"Daddy I'm going, to be honest with you...I'm scared of her." Felicity shrugs. 

"You're scared of her The sweetest woman in the world." Lindsey laughs. 

"Sweetest Woman in the world, Daddy, she fired you. But...I mean,  I'm not scared of her...I'm more scared of like Karen..." Felicity trails off.

"Now that one makes sense. I call her the dragon lady." Lindsey points. 

"I just I don't know...I know I'm probably not going to meet her unless I reach out, but I just...I can't fathom the thought of rejection. I don't know...It's stupid. I just have this irrational fear that I'm going to try and find her and reach out to her but anything I do or say won't get to her and it'll all be for nothing." Felicity shrugs. 

"I'll tell you what. I took it badly when the adoption agency took you, and we could've probably stopped them but we didn't. That's our fault but your mother took it worse than I did. She had always wanted a little girl and even though we found out your genders when she gave birth and the doctor yelled, 'It's a girl', the sob that left her body was unreal." Lindsey explains. 

"Right, so she might accept me but for anything to get to her it has to go through security and Karen." Felicity shrugs. 

"So you aren't going to even consider contacting her?" Lindsey asks shifting in the chair. 

"I don't think so. Besides, I've got you and Kristen." Felicity answers. 

"Um, yeah...about that." Lindsey sighs. 

"What," Felicity turns to him. 

"You realize that you and I weren't invited to go to her family's fourth of July party." 

"You said you didn't go because I couldn't because of work." Felicity sits up straighter and turns to him.

"Well I lied...Kristen and I are separating." Lindsey sighs.

"Like getting a divorce." Felicity clarifies 

"Like living separately for a while and seeing where things go. We've been fighting a lot and we have been since the surgery." Lindsey shrugs. 

"I know, you have to remember that I'm a night owl. I don't go to bed until about three in the morning." She smirks. 

"You've heard." He breathes out. 

"I've heard, Hey daddy I love you. I'm going to go work on some lunch." Felicity smiles rubbing her dad's bicep and kissing his cheek. 

"I love you too sweetheart." 

***

July 2

Lindsey was chopping up some celery, The Everly Brothers playing softly in the background when a knock came at the front door. He sets the knife down and slowly trudges to the door, and he opens it coming face to face with a man that could very well be his son, who is his son. 

"Hi, um I'm Adam Keith, this is my wife Brooke and I...I think you know my mother." He's awkward and Lindsey isn't sure how to take any of this and then he sees Stevie over Brooke's shoulder looking like a sad lost puppy. 

"Ugh...yeah, come in. I was thinking you would've called first at least that's what your sister did. I'm due on the East Coast in a few days for a vocal specialist appointment." Lindsey breathes out.