Stuggles of Life

Slow Painful Destruction to Hell

A gentle breeze from the wind and soft sounds from the river bring me to a place of solitude and calm.
     Yet, as the sun slowly begins to set the rushing streams settle down for the night, as surge of fear suddenly runs throughout my veins. Beginning to get hot and a little sweaty as my hands being slightly shaking.
What is happening, as my clothes soak up all the sweat and now are all gooey and baggy. All of a sudden I begin to feel a burning sensation,  as if the devil is coming to me with all it's dark and scary creations.
Bright orange and a fire red in the sky as it reflects upon the water. The fear that I can possibly be standing in it, as everything below my waist is starting to burn. Sweat dripping from my forehead down the side of my face, painting almost in a lost for a breath. I don't know where I am as the rest of my body begins to shake as well.
This is way worse than just being hot and sweaty i'm talking about being on fire, as if your own sweat is trying to drown you at the same time you are burning. Different thoughts roam my mind but none make a complete sentence. The only thought I can get out is being the evils desire. Throat as dry as the desert with an ache for water whereas my saliva has stopped, and doesn't swan my mouth anymore.
Loud laughter is what I hear as two men make their way where I am, excited to be saved and just excited to get help. Slowly the clouds begin to move closer together and turn a stormy color grey with  precipitation taking over.
Almost thinking its is over, thinking soon I will be free only for the burning to get stronger as my bones show and my skin turns black and red with bruises. The two men are getting closer and closer, to bad it ends there.
As I am just about to say something, to say anything I have no voice to talk, no voice to scream or shout ,and not even a voice to cry as those men pass me by.
Almost like a ghost they can't see me trying to get their attention, they continue on.
Without no help specifically their help I am left to die.
Looking down at my supposed to be feet there are only two crusty knees in the way of nothing.
Standing numb and in pain what to do, should I just let it be, it wasn't supposed to be like this at least not to me. Shadows and what look like demons stand all around me as it starts to get hotter and hotter.
Already at my chest and slowly moving up I have no hair, no eyebrows, no eyelashes those were the first to go.
My heart beating out of my chest and all that takes over at this point is fear.
The fear of what could be next, the fear of where I will end up, the fear I will die, the fear that I won't make it out, Jesus the fear of everything.
What's done in the dark will come to the light, looks like that's what i'm paying for. Looking past all shadows and staring into the fire hell is in front of me, as i'm beginning to boil. No point in even fighting at this point i'm giving up. Giving up hope, giving up the little heart I have left, and giving up most importantly my soul. I see no point in fighting I have no choice but to sit there and take on all that is given to me and all the  consequences that come along with it. Top of my neck reaching my face, all burning except my heart.
The fire is now pressing up against my skin with  sweat continuing to build up as realization beings to finally hit.
After this I will do no more walking enjoying life, no more laughing or crying, no more eating only thing to do is die.
When others set out a calling I stood as still as a rock, but when having a calling from within I wanted everyone to jump but they walked by. The world does not pause for anyone it will keep going and you have to find your own strength to follow along with it.
Death so close I can barely see it, and with a snap of the fingers everything is gone as a set of eyeballs fall rolling around like two balls. Down the bridge everything started on and into the river, and on that que that orange and red sky become lighter as the soft sounded river goes back to that birds chirping and it's almost like nothing happened.