Cloud Chasers

twelve | ascending and descending [pt. one]

Neither of them wanted to let go of the hug before purple clouds surrounded them and took them back to Chase's room. That was the only reason the hug was cut short, otherwise there seemed to be no end in sight. Joyce wiped the tears away from her face as they both sat on the bedside.

"Blackbird..." Chase was the first one to speak. His voice felt heavy to both of them as it broke the long silence. "I wish you would've told me all this sooner. But I'm glad you showed me now."

"I don't tell this. To anybody. My dad is the only outsider who knows about all this. And now you," she said.

"But why don't you tell anybody? Don't you feel lighter now that I know about it?" Chase wondered.

"Because..." Joyce sighed. "Even after all this time, I still don't know what to make of it. Who was the bad guy? Who was the victim? To a certain extent, it's all a matter of perspectives. And what if I tell someone all this, and they see me as the bad guy? The cheater, the breaker of groups, the violent bitch," she said with heavy breath.

Chase stared as her eyes glared at him but never stopped and made eye contact.

"I didn't change the facts. I wrote the story exactly the way it is. I didn't make myself the hero. I didn't try to look perfect. They're the ones who made up stories about me, but I tell things the way they are. And that's why I'd rather not tell them at all. Because how can I know that you won't side with them and abandon me like they did?" This time, Joyce made eye contact and kept it until she was done talking.

"You can know by trusting people, Blackbird. If you trusted me, you'd have known there's no way I would've sided with them. Because I trust you, and I can see who you really are, not what they painted you to be," Chase said.

Numbness infused her body. "I'm sorry I didn't trust you..."

Chase's expression softened. "Please. I can see why you wouldn't trust me. Aside from the fact that you probably don't trust anybody anymore... I told you my story the day we met. About all my struggles with Daisy. And in my story, I'm exactly what Joel was to you."

Joyce shrugged. "Pretty much... that's another reason why I decided to show you my story. I saw the similarities between our lives as soon as you told me yours. And even if I didn't trust you, I cared about you. It was an instant thing, I don't know why, but I felt close to you. And I hated to see you suffer because of Daisy. So I thought my story would help you get a better understanding of your situation.

"I don't know what happened to Joel. I don't know if he was faking it all along, or if I changed him. Either way, he got hurt as much as I did. And I didn't want you to get hurt as well. I didn't want to see you change like he did."

Chase's lashes fluttered. "You're right. It did help me grasp the situation. The book you lent me already kind of did that, with the way it ends, you know? But this. This is not fiction, this is real."

"Me and Joel... it felt real, you know? At first, it felt like it was meant to be. Like it was our destiny. But I loved Mason. And the thing is, when there's love that big for someone, it hardly ever transfers to someone else. Mine was just a momentary lapse of judgment, and it cost me everything. And it hurt people around me."

"I see what you mean. But I'm in love with Daisy. If I take her out of my life, what do I do with all that love?" Chase wondered.

"You keep it within you and put it aside until someone else comes along and you fall in love all over again," Joyce said with confidence.

A corner of his mouth lifted. "Maybe you're right. Sorry, but I can't get out of my mind something you've said. You cared about me?"

"Of course. I've always cared about you. When you obsessed over Daisy, in a way, I wanted to save you," Joyce said.