Sunshine

Raven Reyes

"Where the hell have you been?" Bellamy demanded as soon as I walked into camp. I had slept in late and everybody was already up and working on the wall.

"Taking a walk." I prayed that he wouldn't notice the bag that I was holding on my back.

"All night?" He narrowed his eyes at me.

"I lost track of time." I tried to go around him but he grabbed my arm.

"What's with the bag?"

"I- uh." I stammered looking down at the ground, feeling ashamed.

"You're not a very good liar." He crossed his arms and looked at me, unyielding.

"I can't tell you."

He scoffed, but before I could say anything else he had reached out, taking the bag out of my hand and opened it up. He pulled out a book, a look of disbelief on his face.

"Where'd you get this?"

"That's not your concern." I reached up and tried to grab it back but he was too tall and too quick. "Give it back, please."

"Not until you tell me where you got it." He smirked down at me, having the upper hand.

"Why don't you pick on someone your own size." Finn said coming up behind Bellamy. He plucked the book from him and bowed down in front of me holding it out. "Madam."

"Thank you." I giggled, watching him walk away before turning back to Bellamy with a frown on my face. "You're a bully, Bellamy Blake."

I spun around and headed to my tent without bothering to wait for his reply. I did feel guilty for lying to him, though, but I had to do it if I wanted to protect Murphy. I don't really know what Bellamy would do if he found out. I gritted my teeth and tried not to think about it.

I heard my stomach growl but ignored it because I didn't want to seem suspicious getting breakfast this late. Grabbing my notebook, I decided to write a bit to take my mind off the hunger that was biting into me.

Hey daddy,
Yesterday was a good day, Finn showed me this bunker that was under ground and there were all these books inside.
He told me not to tell anybody about it but I felt bad when I had to lie to Bellamy about it. I took Murphy there and brought him dinner, I get sad whenever I look at him though.
He reminds me of Charlotte and not a day goes by that I don't miss that little girl. Maybe being on the ground brings out the worst of us. I'm sure you're tired of me writing about Atom but the guilt that eats away at me is unwavering. They say that time heals all wounds but why do I feel like I'm bleeding out?
I miss you every single day that you're not here, I can only hope that you're proud of the woman I'm becoming.
Love you forever, Angel.

Sighing, I closed my notebook and pushed it away refusing to let all these depressing thoughts overwhelm me, thinking back to happier times when my father was still alive.

I stood up and decided that I needed a break from myself, and headed towards the dropship. When I climbed up to where Jasper was still resting I saw Octavia, Monty, Finn and Clarke all gathered around him, laughing about something.

"Heya." I said brightly, choosing to ignore the sneer that Clarke sent my way, and sat down beside Monty.

"Angel!" Jasper shouted excitedly, making my heart speed up. "I haven't seen you since like yesterday morning."

"Are you feeling any better?" Octavia asked with concern in her eyes.

"Yeah, I am." I shared a knowing glance with Finn and felt my cheeks heat up with shame. "Thank you."