The Deep End

9

Chapter Song: Send Me on My Way- Rusted Root

I woke up Sunday morning by my door being pounded against almost giving me a heart attack. Sitting up and reached for a hair tie I twist my curls into a low bun and look for my slippers. Sliding my feet into the cozy warmth I forced myself out of bed to grab the door.

"It's Pancake Day!" Liam yelled in my face. His eyes were twinkling with excitement. This was the only day he would willingly get up early. 

"You didn't have to give me a heart attack," I growled shutting the door behind me.

"Listen Sleeping Beauty you know the rules." He grabbed my hand and dragged me up the stairs to the kitchen.

I walked into the brightly lit kitchen and saw World War Three. There was flour everywhere. In every crack and every crevis. I was mortified looking at it. Pancake Day was never this bad.

"Morning kiddo." My dad casually greeted while measuring cups of flour into a ceramic bowl in front of Livi.

"Hi, dad wheres Tish?" I walked towards the coffee pot stopping to kiss his cheek.

"She's out on a run she'll be home in time for pancakes." He gave a small smile.

Tish avoided any form of cooking like the plague. The first Thanksgiving we had together she burnt the mashed potatoes and the turkey came out extra crispy. We ended up eating ham sandwiches and pumpkin pie. It wasn't a bad Thanksgiving now that I think of it, probably my favorite one actually. Ever since then she avoided it. We never argued.

I reached for the unicorn mug Liv made me for a Christmas present last year. Tish took her to one of those painting places. She painted it pretty horribly but I loved it and made a point to use it any chance I got.

Pouring the deep liquid into my mug and I still couldn't get over last night. I stared aimlessly at my phone hoping that a text will pop up. Not that I actually thought Cal would go out of his way to talk to me, but a girl could dream. I already checked on my way upstairs but I had nothing.

Yeah, we got cozy Friday night. I still didn't know what his deal was towards the end of the night? How he seemed to get so upset over something and then was okay when I sat closer to him? I don't know boys are weird.

When he left that night he left like here normally did, just saying see you later before jogging across the street. Not that I was expecting some kind of gesture to say goodbye, but I still didn't think it was going to be that casual. 

He came over yesterday like nothing ever happened either. I didn't get it. I also didn't get why I expected him to text me or talk to me about Friday night. It was just a movie we watched together. It was nothing more. Right? 

Thinking about all of that made my brain hurt. I still didn't understand all the feelings that were stirring inside of me. Not even thinking about where they came from. 

Cal had always been just Cal. My cute next-door neighbor who was friends with my brother and I. But that was that. So when did things start to change between us? 

Exasperated I joined the crew over on the counter. What once was marble was now coated in crystallized spots of amber, flour that could pass as cocaine, and a dash of chocolate chips. Dad was really letting Livi run Pancake Day today.

Sundays were the one day we all had together as a family. We decided to make it Pancake Sunday officially, where we get up early, open all the curtains, blast dad's favorite music, and make pancakes. Sometimes we'd switch it up and make waffles but usually, we were pancake people.

We began to make the first batch of pancakes singing along to all the old songs, that Livi complained about. She wanted Disney songs, and while I wasn't opposed to it Liam would not be happy. Liam took her in his arms and danced with her around the kitchen while my dad and I sang louder. This caused her to have a fit of giggles cheering her up.

By the time we were on our second batch, Tish joined us. She and my dad dance around the griddle waiting for bubbles to form while Liv sat on the counter trying to lick the batter.

"So what's the deal with you and Cal?" Liam grilled me. Woah. I was not expecting that.

"What's the deal with you and Kylie?" I fired back cracking an egg a little too hard into the bowl. I really wanted to get off the topic.

I reached my hand into the bowl to find the eggshells floating around. I looked up to see my dad eyeing me unsure if he should add to this conversation. I didn't know when I became so sensitive about this topic, but I tried to remain calm and collected. Plus I didn't even know my own feelings I didn't want dad to get involved. 

"We're just hanging out." Liam shrugged wiping off the flour from his shirt.

Liam didn't exclusively date. He wasn't a player, just selective when it came to his time and who he spent it with. My dad taught us to be picky, and not waste time on people who don't deserve us.

"Okay." I bluntly stared at him.

"I saw you, Ken." I noticed the wide eyes of my parents shell shocked.

"Saw you when?" Tish exclaimed. I think she secretly wished me and Cal would start dating. That or his older brother. He was also incredibly good looking. 

"I rested my head on his shoulder when everyone was watching movies." I corrected him, "because everyone else had all the pillows." I pointed out trying to return back to the batter.

At that point, I didn't know who I was actually trying to convince here, my family or myself. I didn't want it to be a big deal because it wasn't. Was it?

"Okay so was movie night just an excuse so you could see Cal?" Liam interrupted my thoughts once again.

"No who do you think I am?" I raised my voice higher than expected, looking at dad I added, "nothing like that happened." I realized I was pointing my whisk at him like a weapon and quickly lowered it before any of the batter dripped onto the floor.

"I didn't think anything did." He raised his hands as a sign of surrender. He turned back to scooping the pancakes onto a plate that Tish was holding for him.

"All I'm saying is that I don't want you going around to all my friends. You know and they know that you're both off-limits to each other. Don't forget the rules." He seemed irritated now which infuriated me more.

"Liam they are our friends. Just because you play lacrosse with them doesn't mean I never hung out with them. And fuck your rules!" I shot back.

"Language!" Tish yelled.

I slammed the whisk into the bowl I was mixing splashing batter everywhere. Livi started to scream as if it were a game and threw some batter towards Liam but he ignored her.

"And you just assume I have feelings for a guy because I leaned on him." I stared at him dumbfounded, "because god forbid that's all that happened."

"Ken I didn't mean it like th-"

"No, I know exactly what you meant Liam. Cal is your best friend and he matters way more to you than I do. I'm just your sister who wants to hook up with her brother's hot friends. Cool." I said throwing my hands signaling my pretend white flag. I would have waited for a response but his open mouth said more than words would.

"I'm not hungry anymore," I mumbled rushing down the stairs back to my room.