i've been trying to find your pretty
underneath all the ugliness . trying to find your soul underneath all your wicked ways . trying to find your heart because i'm convinced it's made of stone .
and then i saw it . your smile . your beauty , your innocence is hidden in your smile . no , i'm not talking about that the outrageous laughter that you increase in volume to be heard , not the way you gossip to seek validation , not the way you carry yourself asking for attention .
the small smile that you give a stranger after they've greeted . but it's quick . it's fleeting .
your insecurities then consume you whole and you become this horrible person that i can't stand .
you're rude , honestly . you're selfish and basic .
i wish we could switch bodies for a day , you could be me and i could be you .
you'd find out how simple words , uttered in seconds , can stop a beating heart .
you'd find out how simple actions , which you take as " jokes " remains for a lifetime .
you'd see the tears fall , you'll feel the anxiety in your chest , flowing like a high tide ocean .
but you're not me . you won't know .
dear bully , i hope i find peace , i hope i redeem my confidence .
as for you , i can't say much . you'll continue regardless of my feelings , regardless of my tears , regardless of my pleas .
but like me , i wish you'd find out .
find out how a beating heart can shatter .
