Open My Eyes

{Ch. 22} Distance ✓

Life became a routine: visit Vanessa's grave every couple of days, complete my shift at Hope and Miracles, hang out with Iggy between 4:30 and 6:00 p.m., eat dinner, and spend the night with Sam and Kae.

However, a buzzing in the back of my mind would remind me, every once in a while, about Iggy's uncertainties and insecurities. I could ignore it for the most part: Iggy seemed normal, always joking and teasing. But after our one a.m. phone calls, I wondered if it still bothered him. If he still worried over the impact his sightlessness had on our relationship. If he feared I would leave because he couldn't see me.

When I lay in bed or scrubbed the dishes in the kitchen at H and M, his words echoed in my mind: "I can't tell you you're beautiful." Even Ben's voice would playback: "He's a little more self-conscious." I would toss and turn, or splash water onto the floor, in worry. I liked Iggy, his blindness didn't bother me.

But when I tried to reassure him by randomly blurting how much I liked him or squeezing his hand in silence, his smile didn't quite touch his eyes. He would say he liked me too and squeeze my hand in kind. And he'd return to a solemn expression, the slightest frown, the smallest wrinkles. And my heart would drop.

Ever since I had met his family, the real kind of laughter lessened between us. I'd tell him stories of Sam and Kae, and I'd catch his mouth slacken or his lips press together in a taut line. When he'd walk me to my car, he held my hand loosely. His kisses became quick pecks. He sighed—a lot.

In the blink of an eye that twisted my stomach, we approached the end of August. With a final twist, Kae scheduled a flight back to school.

"Can't you do online schooling?" I mumbled into his chest as he crushed me in a hug.

He chuckled. "Sorry, short fry. Maybe I'll consider that for my master's."

I stared into his blue eyes and touched the dimple in his chin while he pushed the dip in mine. "Time went by too fast. We rarely ever got milkshakes. We didn't play video games until the morning for two weeks in a row. We didn't—"

"You had to get yourself a volunteer position and a boyfriend." He cast me a lopsided grin. "Besides, it gave me time to hang out with my friends from high school. And I got to see Sam again. Not to mention I had that weird rash on my arm . . ."

With a roll of my eyes, I said, "You had a sunburn from spending the day with your friends." Then I pouted. "But you barely got to see your sister. Your reason for living."

He tossed his head back to laugh. "Now, now, my reason for living is your sock collection." He gestured to my socks: a sunglasses-wearing banana riding on a skateboard.

"Wow. Feel the love," I droned.

When our laughter subsided, I crashed into him again. "This sucks."

"It always sucks, Ang."

"Graduate early?"

"I'm not that smart."

"Yeah, I know."

He pinched me.

"Hey!"

He smiled and ruffled my hair. "Alright, I gotta head out if I'm gonna catch my flight on time."

We hugged a final time. Kae grabbed his luggage and he and Mom waved goodbye.

"Text me when you land!" I called from the front porch.

"You got it!"

"Call me when you're back at your apartment!"