Art of Manipulation |One Punch Man| |Reader Insert|

|YĪ|

"Fight me."

"No."
Saitama walked backwards in front of you, his usual egg-head expression on.

"Please."

"No."
You felt the punch before it came at you. You locked onto his body which flew at you in slow motion. You grabbed his fist a good distance from your face, diverting the shockwave by making it drill into the ground. Your clothes whipped around from the force, but you stayed still.

"Hm..." Saitama hummed. Even though his punches were faster than light, you slowed them. You blocked each fist and diverted the power from it into someplace harmless. Your hand suddenly appeared in his vision, but it was too late. Your palm connected to his cheek.

"Blast away."
He went flying through multiple high-rise buildings. You pulled up your sleeve and looked at the watch that wasn't on your wrist.

'A few seconds now.'

"... you have a strong slap."
You sighed and turned to face Saitama, crossing your arms.

"And you have an annoyingly hard body," you retorted.

"... fight me."

"I just did."

"Fight me again."

"No."

"..."

"... please-"

"NO!"

~
You were in Saitama's apartment, reading a manga book. He went out to the store to buy some groceries.

"'He kissed his lips, forcing his tongue into his mouth-' huh?" You looked up at the window. It was barely there, but you could see the panes vibrate. You let out a sigh and placed the book down.

"Man... no rest for the weary, huh?" You muttered. You walked out onto the balcony and jumped from the railing. You used your powers to keep yourself from falling, allowing you to fly through the air. You flew up high above the ground, looking around City Z. Your eyes squinted at a large, mountainous-sized figure far out in the distance.

"... is that a titan?"
With a hum, you took off towards the large thing. Buildings whizzed by you, but you didn't feel any wind on your face at all. In less than four seconds, you appeared in front of the titan's face. He stopped in his tracks. You squinted your eyes at him.

"Bro, put some fucking pants on."

"Who the hell are you!?" The small person on the titan's shoulders yelled. You appeared in front of him.

"Someone who can't have one fucking day off," you replied.

"Kill her!!" The man yelled.

"Christ."
You avoided the big ass fist easily, your e/c eyes took on a purple glow. You twisted your fingers, and the giant's arms twisted off. It cried out in pain, stumbling back into more towns and cities.

"Wh-what the-?!" The scientist cried.

"Ohhh..." A glint appeared in your eyes. The giant's body outlined in purple, and he slowly began to levitate off the ground. Both of them yelped out in panic.

"Calm down," you said calmly, "Nothing bad will happen." You then clenched your hand, and the giant's body was crushed into a ball, spraying blood everywhere. You then pushed your arm down, and his body collided into the ground, breaking the earth apart into uneven terrain. Shock waves traveled through the air and on the ground, shattering building windows and blowing citizens off their feet.

"Oh... oops..."
Gravity returned around you, and you shot down towards the ground again at breakneck speeds. Right before you hit it, you rotated your body and balled up magic in your hands, slowing your descent, until you landed on the ground softly.
You let out a sigh, and shook out your hands.

"Hey... what the heck happened?" You turned and saw Saitama with that dumb expression on his face.

"'Bout time you got here," you chastised, "Where were you? I had to take this brute down myself."

"Sorry," Saitama said blankly. You sighed.

"Well, whatever. It's taken care of." You walked by him and tapped his shoulder. "Let's go. You bought food, right? I'll make us lunch today."

"OH...!"
You turned, brows furrowed.

"What's the matter?"

"I FORGOT THE EGGS!!!!"

~
A few days later, you were inside your shared apartment, washing dishes from last night. Saitama was outside watering his lone cactus. The news was on, something about an infestation of a new mosquito species. You didn't really pay attention.

"Hm... maybe I should make some dumplings... but then we need to go shopping again-"

THWUMP

Your head snapped towards the balcony doors. "Yo, the fuck are you doing out there?!" You shouted.

"MO...!"

THWUMP

"SQUI...!"

THWUMP

"TO...!" Saitama shouted back. You let out a sigh.

"Of course... idiot," you murmured. As you were drying a dish, your stomach all of a sudden went nauseous.

'Oh shit... am I pregnant?' You legitimately panicked for a second.

'Wait, I haven't had sex...' You shook off your thoughts and placed the plate on the counter, taking off towards the balcony.

"Saitama, I sense danger nearby. Don't wait up!" You disappeared into the distance before he got a chance to reply. Through the air, your eyes landed on a floating black mass.

'The hell is that... goddammit...' You thought, flying down to the ground. Someone was already there. A man-or a cyborg... of some kind, who was missing an arm. You didn't pay any mind to him and kept your eyes on the big ball of bugs.

"Bruh..." You said with a sigh.

"Hey, you," the man called, "Evacuate. The swarm is conscious. If they sense you, they'll attack." You stared at him.

"I mean, I kind of knew that, but thanks." You looked back up at the swarm, purple beginning to swirl in your eyes. That same color began to swim through the swarm. You snapping your fingers. Purple burst through in a whoosh. Hundreds of mosquitos fell to the ground, wings no longer attached to their bodies. They fell in mass numbers. Walking, but not flying or doing any harm. Genos looked on in both awe and wonder. Sure, scientifically, it was possible for a species to devolve back into their previous states, but he's never seen someone do it so easily and proficiently before. It amazed him.

The sound of bare feet slapping the pavement and yells drew your attention away. There was Saitama, chasing the damn mosquito with bug spray. Your eyes twitched and you turned your attention onto him.

"Idiot."
With a snap of your fingers, the mosquito went falling to the ground.

"... eh?" Saitama came sliding to a stop.

"God you're so stupid..."

Ja ne!

{Ruby Red}