Considering how I promised myself to check on him, I went to visit Yuri today. He was finally allowed to have visitors after his operation a few days ago.
However, he seemed... off. When I tried to speak with him, he would occasionally screech. He would occasionally shout "EPIC PRO GAMER".
Dear God save us all. Despite having his brain tumor removed, it was already too late. He was infected by Ligma. All because of Mike default dancing on him.
Dammit, dammit, dammit.
That bastard.
I left early before I could feel myself getting any of the symptoms of Ligma. As much as I didn't like leaving Yuri behind so soon, I didn't want to get infected by him.
I went over to Mike's house, the first person greeting me being his mother.
That hunch I had that he smelled like his basement was true.
His mother explained that he had been this way for days now, I had remembered that his mother is a baby boomer and just blamed the video games without looking into them. I hate to admit it, but this time, this is indeed because of a video game.
That didn't excuse how terribly his mother handled the situation, she didn't even try talking her son out of it. All she did was yell at him and left him in the basement to rot.
Before she could release any anger on me, however. She had instead offered me a snack: Sugondese nuts.
These were my favorite, but they were extremely hard to find as the Sugondese tribe is very protective with their plants, especially the nuts. I asked Mrs. Ock if I could take some home with me, she simply shrugged and told me to have it.
However, when I prepared to leave, I heard a loud thud that came from the basement.
Mrs. Ock and I went down to check out what happened, but when we went down,
Mike was completely unconscious, he still wore his headphones, but the force from his fall combined with his weight had disconnected the wires, causing them to break. His chair was toppled over, assuming it fell with him. His keyboard was also in bad shape, so he must have hit it when he fell. But the computer screen showing his game was still on.
I decided to check his pulse to see if he was still breathing.
Nothing.
Absolutely nothing.
He was gone. Mike U. Mungus Ock had completely left this world.
All because of the disease he had acquired from us brainwashing him.
What have we done?
I promised that I would not let another death from this terrible disease happen again, but I have failed in that.
Mrs. Ock was on the floor, in tears. But I couldn't bring myself to even shed one tear for my friend.
Instead, I had offered to have him buried in the place where everyone who died of Ligma goes.
Updog, Philadelphia.
During his burial, I felt nothing but guilt. I couldn't help but hate myself for letting something like this happen. I couldn't say a word to Mrs. Ock, who, despite being a fucking boomer, I still felt terrible. Mike was the only one in her life she had left.
I was on the verge of giving up on this research completely, but then I remembered.
Yuri still had Ligma.
Once I remembered, I ran all the way to the hospital to see Yuri. Hoping and praying that he was still suffering from the earlier symptoms. Hoping that it wasn't too late to save him.
When I had entered his room, he was asleep. But thanks to the heart monitor connected to him, I didn't have to worry so much about having to check his pulse.
I greeted him, which he then slowly opened his eyes awake.
But when he woke up, the first thing he said was:
"Give me your mom's credit card number."
The words that got him hospitalized in the first place.
As much as I wanted to panic, I decided it would be best to stay calm.
In order to calm him down, I decided to offer him some of the Sugondese nuts I received from Mrs. Ock, he loves those, so I thought maybe one of his favorite snacks would calm him down.
He refused to eat them however. Autistically screeching at me and yelling at me to give him my mom's credit card number.
I decided to shove the snacks in his mouth because I needed for him to stay calm so I can analyze him better.
And a miracle happened, his actions have completely come to a halt as soon as the nuts were shoved in his mouth.
It was like...
The Sugondese nuts were the cure the whole time.
As his body relaxed, he then asked me what had happened. I explained that he had caught the Ligma disease from Mike and that I had only discovered the cure just now thanks to him.
Sadly, I had to bring to him the bad news that Mike had just passed away because the disease was left uncured.
But now that I have found a cure, I can finally rest my case.
The solution to Ligma was the Sugondese nuts the whole time.
I will soon release my research into the world so that we can finally rid the world of this disgusting disease.
Dr. Joe Mamah, signing out.
