Mel
Dad kept pacing back and forth. To the door back to the kitchen. Each foot landed on the wooden floors making creaks and thuds. It was the only sound that filled the silence. He seemed to be pulled from both ways. To tell Petra that I couldn't go and breaking his promise. I pretended the first half didn't hurt, as he mumbled to himself about what he was going to do.
I let out a long sigh from my nose and laid my head down on the table, where Petra sat this morning. I let my eyes stare out the kitchen window above the sink, the sun shone brightly through it and lit up the floor. The greyish walls helped the room look brighter than it was. "I don't understand what the big deal is," I mumbled under my breath, but dad still heard me. His feet stop and turn to look at me. Even if I wasn't looking at him I could see his expression. I could hear the gears turning in his head as he thought of what he should say to me. I wondered if it would be the same excuses he used every month.
"After losing your mom I don't want to lose you too. I'm just worried" or "You're not ready yet Mel" is usually what he defaulted to, but I stopped genuinely believing him a long time ago. It all felt like empty words and yet I never challenged them.
I waited for him to say something. He didn't. I sat up a little to look at him. There was hurt in his eyes. Conflict. I averted my gaze to the ground. My sentence wasn't too difficult to answer back, but maybe this time it was. Either way, even though I had said it, I didn't really want to hear the response to it. Not if I was just going to get hurt by the words anyways. Pushing the chair back from the table and standing, I started to make my way past him to the front door.
"I'm gonna head out for a bit"
"Mel, wait." speaking up finally, his hand reached out to gently grasp my shoulder, stopping me from walking out as Petra had. I wanted to shrug him off and smile like none of this bothered me but it did. And it was getting harder for me to contain.
"It hurts you know," I told him, swallowing thickly. "That you agreed to take Petra before you even would have considered to take me. It says a lot about what you would do for others and not for your own kid" I looked down at my feet, I could see the hurt in his eyes. "I get why you're scared, but it doesn't make it hurt any less."
The grip on my shoulder loosened and he let his hand fall to his side. As he took the time to think of something to say back, I took the moment to walk out of his reach and left. I said goodbye before letting the door close quietly behind me. I took stepped over the stairs on the way up to our door before walking down the main road to a smaller one leading to the woods. I needed a few moments alone.
Spidore was a small town. Most of the houses were made of stone and wood, lanterns followed the main path through the town and lit up the main road at night. The road and paths were made of dirt, all from years of carts being pulled through and people walking over those areas for decades. Woods surrounded the town us, they were dense and yet not so easy to get lost in. We weren't on any map, that's how small we are, and many people get surprised when they stumble across Spidore on their travels.
Everyone knew, cared and made sure everything was safe for each other. We had our own gatherings to celebrate the holidays, none of which would match that of the Capital. Astrah was known for going above and beyond for their festivals. Sometimes you could see fireworks from there in Spidore. It was nice on the occasions it happens. Spidore was a town of people close to each other. It didn't make it feel less lonely though. Sure I had Petra and Pyke, but it didn't feel like it was enough. I knew next to none about the world around me. I've read books, but it's not the same as experiencing it. It felt unfulfilling to not know about any of it.
YOU ARE READING
Of Rebels and Kings
FantasiMelchoir Tel'Valha disappeared the night of the castle raid, wanted at the age of 5 a small town called Spidore hid him from himself and travelers were none the wiser. Now 18, Mel Valoren still suffers from the weight of nightmares he doesn't know t...